“Sadie?” another voice called.
I opened my eyes and peered around Hector’s body. I could see both Ralphie and Buddy standing just inside the door.
Hector stepped to the side and I saw them fully.
Ralphie was carrying an overnight bag. Buddy was carrying a huge vase of exquisite white calla lilies, my favorites.
They were staring at me and they looked pale (yes, even Buddy, I didn’t know black people could go pale but he did).
“Sweetie?” Ralphie said hesitantly.
Even though he called me “sweetie” (and he’d never called me “sweetie”), Ice Princess clicked into place.
“I’m okay,” I said immediately.
One second Ralphie was across the room. The next second I was in his arms.
“Oh Sadie, sweet ‘ums. You didn’t have an accident, did you?” he asked, his voice whisper-soft, one arm around my waist, the other hand stroking my back.
“Ralphie, I’m fine.” I held my body rigid and spoke to his throat.
He leaned back and looked down at me. “Sweetie, you are not fine. I can see, can’t I? I didn’t go blind in the night like a bad Jodie Foster movie. And I just got back from your apartment. It’s a disaster. What on earth happened? Who did this to you?”
This was not working well for me. It was all coming at me. Everyone was talking about it. How could I set it aside to deal with it later when people were talking about it?
“I’m gonna break his f**kin’ neck.” Buddy was now at our side.
I turned my head and looked up at Buddy, he got a close look at my face and I saw his teeth clench.
Then he repeated between his teeth, “I’m gonna break his f**kin’ neck. Who did it?”
“I’m fine,” I said again.
“You have a cast on your wrist,” Ralphie pointed out and I looked back at Ralphie.
“I’m fine,” I repeated.
“You have a bandage on your face,” Ralphie went on.
I could take no more and really, could you blame me?
So I screamed, “I’m fine!”
Ralphie had never seen me lose my cool, never, therefore at my scream he winced. Then for some reason, he ignored my Chill Factor. His arms got tight and he pulled me close.
And no one had held me like that for as long as I could remember.
And I couldn’t bear it anymore.
I shoved my face in his ultra-elegant shirt and clenched his uber-stylish suit jacket in my good hand and I cried.
I didn’t care who saw me. Not even Hector.
Fuck it. I could take no more.
It was not wracking, sobbing, loud crying. It was silent, body-jerking, soul-wrenching crying.
Through it all, and it seemed to last a long time, Ralphie held on.