I froze solid at the change in his face and the fury in his eyes as he whispered back, “That, Anya, you confirmed you got me, would right now have your ass bared to me.”
Oh God.
I pushed away.
His arm and hand got tighter.
I stopped pushing and breathed deep.
“You stick by me,” he ground out, “you, and only you, will learn why I am how I am. No one knows. No one. But you, Anya, you stick with me, I’ll share. And right now, bonus. I’ll tell you what you already know but you don’t understand. I like control and I have a temper. I see the world a certain way. I want my world a certain way. And I set about getting it. If I don’t, if I can’t control that, harness it, things can get ugly. So I do. When I do, say when I’m punishing you, I never lose control because what I’m doing is a release. And the only time I’ll lose control is when I’m finally inside you and you’ll like that, I promise you.”
God, now he was turning me on, putting me off and making me curious all at the same time!
He drew in breath and the anger slid out of his eyes.
Then his thumb glided over my jaw, his hand shifted up to cup it and then his thumb slid across my cheek and then my lips as his eyes held mine and he whispered, “I can do gentle. I can do normal. I can and will do you a lot of ways, baby. And you got a preference, all you gotta do is ask and if I’m in the mood, I’ll give it to you. But you’re in my bed, my home, my ride, my club, you gotta get that I’m the man, yield to that and trust that I’ll always take care of you.”
Do me a lot of ways?
I sought clarification.
“Are you into, like, um… tying me up?” I asked.
“Bondage? Restraints? Gags?” he asked back.
I nodded.
He answered, “Absolutely.”
Wow.
That just turned me on and made me curious.
Crap.
“This is…” I paused, “a little,” I searched for a word, “unusual.”
One side of his mouth curled up. “Yeah. It’s also me.”
“Can I be me?” I asked and his brows drew together.
“What?”
“If I’m, um… yielding to you, I don’t know if… I mean, can I be me?”
“Uh… yeah.”
“How?”
“You’ll get the boundaries.”
“Without any explanation?”
“Babe, I bought you that phone because you needed one. I bought you those dresses because the way you dress, I know you like clothes but can’t afford the good shit, so I got you the good shit you’d like that would make you happy. I did not do any of that shit to buy anything from you. And me doin’ something nice and you implying I’m buyin’ you was not cool. So that, that would get punishment in a way you’d have trouble sittin’ down for a couple of days. I told you I drive my ride when you’re in it. You kept pushin’ that, knowin’ I laid that out, that would get you punishment. I already explained the dance floor. Are you not seein’ the pattern of boundaries here?”
“But I like to dance,” I whispered.
“Then put on music at my place and dance all the f**k you want. Have a party and ask all your friends over and dance. Go out with your girls not at my club and dance. But you’re in your section in my club, you don’t dance.”