Nor did he like.
“It was for the best.”
“It was for the best?” he repeated, sounding appalled.
“I’m… you…” she stammered. “You wouldn’t have Jason. You wouldn’t have Sally.” It was Prentice who closed his eyes then and Bella went on, her voice getting stronger. “You wouldn’t have had Fiona.” Prentice’s eyes opened and pain was there, Bella saw it and she swallowed. Then her hand lifted and she touched the laugh lines at the sides of his eyes with her forefinger. “You wouldn’t have those, Prentice, because you wouldn’t have had the laughter I know Fiona gave you.”
Fiona felt her throat close as she watched Prentice bend his neck and rest his forehead against Bella’s.
“I have to go,” she whispered and his head shot right back up.
“Sorry?” he asked in a dangerous tone.
“I have to go,” she repeated.
Fiona watched Prentice’s eyes narrow. “What the f**k are you on about?”
“I have to go,” she said yet again.
Fiona got close and shouted, Don’t. Don’t Bella. This isn’t you. You aren’t the dark cloud. That was all your father. Don’t do this. Don’t go.
“You aren’t going,” Prentice declared.
“I am. I have to,” she told him.
“You aren’t and you can’t,” he shot back.
“Don’t you see?”
“No, I f**king well do not.”
Her body jolted. “Annie and Dougal’s wedding, perfect, except for me.”
“You didn’t ruin their wedding.”
“No? Who did? Me being here brought my father here and –”
“This is insane, Elle. You aren’t –”
“Insane? Like my mother?” Fiona watched Prentice’s head jerk but Bella wasn’t done. “She was insane, Prentice. People in their right minds don’t kill themselves.”
“People in their right minds find reasons to kill themselves every day,” he returned.
“You don’t know.”
“You don’t either.”
“I know my mother wasn’t in her right mind. I know that for certain.”
“Elle –”
“And you don’t need that in your life or in your children’s lives.”
Prentice’s face grew stunned. “Are you saying –?”
“I’m saying I’m a product of her and him and that is what you’ll have around your children if we carry on with this madness.”
“You may be a product of them, Elle, but you’re you.”