I gave him time, counting the seconds, waiting until his breath started to even then I ordered, “Get off me.” His head came up and I felt his eyes but I kept mine to his throat and repeated, “Get off me.”
“I think what just happened proves we need to talk, Sylvie,” he said softly. At his words, I heaved, twisted, he slid out and I took him to his side, back to the back of the couch.
I reared away but not so far that I couldn’t plant my hand in his chest and shove hard.
He got up on a forearm, his other hand circled my wrist tight and held mine to his chest as his eyes kept mine captive.
“You’re a total ass**le,” I hissed.
He didn’t reply, not for long seconds then he said quietly, “I had you but in the end, you checked out. I was just a cock.”
“They’re all just cocks,” I retorted.
He shook his head and his fingers tightened around my wrist as he leaned into me. “I had you.”
“No one has me.”
“I had you.”
I leaned into him and snapped, “No one ever has me.” I ignored the flash in his eyes and I ignored how easy it was to read, how hard it was to see that in his eyes. I ignored all of it and yanked at my hand.
He didn’t release me.
“Let me go,” I demanded harshly.
He let me go.
I jumped off the couch and moved to my clothes. I pulled on the tank and my jeans and left my panties, bra, socks and boots where they lay.
By the time I turned back, he had his jeans up and half buttoned.
I looked from his crotch to his eyes.
“Guest bedroom is a pit but, you dig deep enough, you’ll find a bed. You look hard enough, you’ll find sheets for the bed. I’m going out. Sweet dreams.”
I moved toward the door trying to decide if it was a bourbon or tequila night.
“I couldn’t have you, I’d have that.”
His words made me stop dead but I didn’t turn. I didn’t move.
Years passed.
Then he spoke again, quieter.
“I never thought I’d see you again. I couldn’t have you, I’d have that part of you. That part of us. Kids named what we agreed so every time I said the names of the kids I loved, I’d remember you and I’d have that part of you with me.”
Jesus.
He could not be serious.
Jesus.
Someone kill me.
I turned then and looked him straight in the eye.
“You are so full of shit.”