Kindred Spirit - Noah Harris Page 0,44
issues or shove me behind a desk. The DDI told me I could make a difference in the world, that I could help to keep people safe. Both regular people, and people with...differences, like yours.”
“Yeah, I’m just ‘different’ is all,” Levi muttered bitterly.
Jacob looked up at that, a faint flare of frustration bursting in his chest. “Yeah, you are. You, that telekinetic, the pyro I gunned down a few months ago, the telepath who was so strong she lost her mind and became a danger to everyone around her. You, them, all of the people like you, there’s nothing wrong with them.”
Levi straightened. “You’re a hitter.”
“Sometimes. And sometimes I’m there to contain a problem without having to kill anyone. But that’s what I’m good at, getting in, doing the messy work, and getting out. I don’t get to see much of the other side, where the DDI helps people, keeps them safe. I’m a glorified, bloody plumber.”
He’d known that about himself since the beginning. Jacob had been trained as a weapon, and what else do you do with a weapon other than to aim it at someone? It was messy, bloody, and altogether ugly, but he didn’t fool himself. The world needed people who were willing to do the messy things in life. He might have a hard time sleeping sometimes, but he took that on so that others would never have to suffer the faintest trace of sleeplessness. It wasn’t noble, it wasn’t pretty, but it was necessary, damn it.
Jacob gripped Levi’s elbows tightly. “So yeah, when my boss offered me the chance to try something else, to do something else, I took it. Maybe for once I didn’t have to get thrown into a situation where I was dealing with someone who was just…”
Levi cocked his head. “Just what?”
Jacob threw up his hands. “I saw the file on that telepath! She’d been shoved from one ‘specialist’ to another, therapists, doctors, hospitals. Crazy, they didn’t use that word, but that’s what they called her in the end, crazy. She’d been a drug addict, tried to kill herself four different times, and didn’t have a soul by her side. But when she finally reached the end of her rope, there was no choice but to kill her. And I had to be the one to do it! I had to put a bullet in the skull of a woman whose entire life had been defined by everyone, fucking everyone, failing her.”
Jacob took a deep breath. “What if there had been someone there to help her before? What if we had acted sooner, helped her sooner? All it would have taken was just one goddamn person to reach out and help her, to show her they cared. But they didn’t, and I had to fucking kill her, I had to blow her brains across the wall. The world failed her, but I was the one who had to clean up the mess. And I did it because someone had to. She was too far gone.”
“Jacob,” Levi said softly, inching closer to him.
Jacob barely heard him, though, gritting his teeth to the point he swore he heard them crack. “So when my boss told me about this job, I had to take it. I looked at your file, and all I saw was someone being failed just like her. Just like the pyro who’d been abused and neglected his whole life. Someone who could use someone, even if it was someone from a distance, who was watching out for them.”
Levi looked about to say something but thought better of it.
Jacob continued. “And then I met you and I...God, I don’t know, Levi. I couldn’t just pretend it was a job. Maybe it was never a job, maybe in the beginning, I just wanted to prove I was right, and people like you just needed someone. But then I met you, I got to know you, and I realized not only was I right, but you were more than just someone. You were more than just a person in need of help. You were honest and bright, and I quickly loved the way you laughed. I found it amazing and beautiful at how you could be so blunt, but the minute I complimented you or flirted, you’d get bashful and shy.”
Jacob paused for a beat. “And then I kissed you, and I realized I’d never kissed anyone like that before, never been kissed like that. So yeah, I lied to you, Levi, I