mean I don’t miss him like crazy knowing I won’t see him for the next week. I do. It means that I’m going to complete my schoolwork, go to work, and figure out whatever else I have to do in order to become as independent as possible.
This morning I’m not working. I have to meet with Denise in a little while for my counseling appointment. After I’m done with that, I’ll be heading into work. The only good thing about my day today is I’ll be too busy to think about missing Killer.
No matter what I tell myself, I can’t get over this stupid ass crush on Killer. It’s as if he’s worked his way into my very soul and won’t let go now. I don’t want to like him or be half in love with him already. Yes, I know enough to realize I’ve been falling in love with Killer for a long time now. And it’s not one thing or another as to why I’ve been falling for the man who invades my every sense.
Killer is quiet more often than not. He tends to sit back and watch the action around him. When he needs to step in, he’s ready for almost anything thrown his way. I’ve watched him take down grown men bigger than him, and that’s hard to be, without breaking a sweat. Whenever he’s around me, if I get into any kind of trouble from falling off a chair, to tripping over air, Killer’s always by my side to catch me. When he thinks I’m not watching him, I feel his eyes on me. His gaze penetrates my skin and heats me from the inside out. It’s the only time I’m ever truly warm.
Now that we’re living together, I have seen he likes to read. The books lining his shelves are full of history, motorcycles, and several other subjects. When I’m still awake, but not in the mood to talk to him, Killer goes to the garage to tinker on whatever is in there. I’ve never ventured out there to see him. I figured if he wanted me out there, he’d invite me himself. So, that’s never a place I go. Even to park my car when it’s raining or something.
Whenever I’m with Killer, I feel safer than I ever have in my entire life. While I know there’s still so much I have to experience and learn about the world, life, and everything around me, with Killer at my back, I’m not quite as afraid to do what I want to. That’s one of the reasons him being gone for a week is going to mess with me so bad.
After taking care of my breakfast dishes, I make my way to my room so I can gather what I need to get ready for the day. It’s warm out as the sun shines through the many windows of Killer’s home, heating the rooms up to the point I want to open windows to let in fresh air. With me being the only one here, I won’t do that. I’m not that brave.
Taking a shower, I make sure to get dressed in the bathroom because I’m not sure if the Prospects on babysitting duty will come in the house or not, I also do my light make-up. Once that’s all done, I take care of my hair, placing it up in a messy bun so it stays out of my face while I’m working today. With one last look in the mirror, I know I’m ready to head out for the day.
In the room I’m currently staying in, I make sure I have my shirt for work. Thankfully Brenda lets us wear whatever we want to work. Today I’m wearing jean capris with a black tank top. It will allow me to simply put the shirt on over my tank top. Sitting in the chair in the corner of my room, I put on my sneakers so I can leave the house and be a few minutes early to my appointment. It’s important for me to be early. I’m not sure why though; it’s just something ingrained in me.
Grabbing my purse off the nightstand in my room, I walk through the house and make sure everything is shut off, unplugged, and the doors and windows are locked before turning off the alarm system just inside the front door. There’s also another panel by the door leading inside from the garage. Killer is the only one