Josh and Hazel's Guide to Not Dating - Christina Lauren Page 0,46
to know them, and she never tried to connect with Em, either. As I’m sure you’ve noticed, my parents are pretty mellow. They aren’t going to push themselves on anyone, but it matters to them that they know what’s going on and that the person I’m with becomes a part of our family. Tabby was never interested in that. It’s funny that I’m only now realizing why they never pushed for us to get married. It was awkward, a little, when Emily told us Dave proposed, and I wasn’t even with anyone. I think we all assumed I would get married first simply because I’m older. But they knew she wasn’t right for me, even if I didn’t yet.”
I think of my mom, and how she knows almost every detail of my life. I can’t really imagine it any other way. “That makes sense.”
He swallows and nods at me. His eyes are growing a little unfocused. “Yeah, you get it. Tabby never did.”
“Well, I think we can agree Tabby is an asshole. Which is why she never got her own personalized fried rice.”
Josh clinks my glass.
“The first time your mom came over and you were still at work,” I say, “she spent fifteen minutes cutting paper napkins in half. She told me they were too expensive to use only once.” I remember the matter-of-fact way she explained what she was doing and it made me look back on every paper napkin I’ve wasted in my life. “I mean, if I did that, you’d chalk it up to me being odd, but she does it and it totally makes sense, right?”
“She’s pretty great at finding ways to save and reuse.”
The room is a little swishy around the edges and I lean against his shoulder, starting to feel sleepy. Against the side of my head, he’s so solid, but above that sensation is the vibrant heat of him. “You’re a furnace.”
Josh nods, and I feel the side of his face brush against my hair. “I run pretty hot.”
“You sure do.”
He laughs, shaking a little against me. His voice comes out slurred: “You ready to head out?”
We turn to the window, and only now do we realize the rain is coming down in thick sheets, and neither of us is in a state to get behind the wheel.
“Cab?” Josh asks.
“My place is two blocks from here. We can run it. You can sleep on the couch with Winnie.”
··········
We’re soaked, freezing, and hammered, sprinting up the five flights to my apartment in a drunken attempt to get warm. Josh stops just inside the door, dripping on the small rug there, cupping his shoulders and shivering. He still takes the time to slip off his shoes.
Winnie gives him a courtesy sniff before deciding it is too late for this nonsense and walking away again. I’m sure she assumes he’ll just follow her into bed.
“Give me your clothes.” I motion him forward. “Come on.” I am breathless from the run, and high from my cocktails. The floor undulates beneath my feet.
He giggles. “If I give you my clothes, then I’ll have no clothes on.”
He seems to have grown even drunker on the run home. Drunk Josh is my favorite.
“Okay.” I put my fingertip to my nose. “I have an idea. Go to the bathroom. Get undressed and get in the shower. I’ll sneak in, take your clothes without peeking, put them in the dryer, and bring you a blanket. Boom.”
He tiptoes down the hall, laughing when his shoulder collides with the doorway to the bathroom, offering it a quiet “Sorry.”
The door closes and the shower starts, and I’m suddenly distracted by the wet slap of Josh’s clothes on the floor and stark awareness that he’s naked in there. With a clarity I’m surprised my booze-soaked brain can muster, my thoughts bend to the memory of him talking about fingering someone under the table.
Settle down, Drunk Hazel. Josh has been naked in places near you before. I used to live at his house and he was naked all the time. Josh naked isn’t interesting, right?
STOP SAYING NAKED.
I shake my head, and it makes the world tilt and then slowly right itself. Winnie appears again and licks my hand. I reach to pet her, missing her head the first time.
The shower curtain screeches open and then closed again as he climbs in, and his low groan of happiness reaches me all the way out in the living room.
The sound does weird things to me. Weird, warm, slithery things,