Jilted Jock - Rebecca Jenshak Page 0,43
fire. I wouldn’t let him burn down my life just to satisfy some curiosity. In two days, he was going back to his real life.
“I have to go.” I stalked into my room, grabbed my suitcase and purse, and in a very uncharacteristic move, I didn’t even do a last check to make sure I hadn’t forgotten anything. I’d worry about that if and when it happened. Right now, I needed to get the hell out of here.
Adele
I was a big, fat coward. And a tired one, too. I was going on maybe fifteen minutes of sleep. Every time I’d drifted off on the plane, I’d woken with the feel of Finn’s lips pressed to mine.
Richard waved from his table, dark hair perfectly in place and crisp white button-down shirt. He smiled and I took a deep breath for the first time today. Everything was fine. I was right where I was supposed to be.
When I reached the table, he stood and wrapped his arms around me. I closed my eyes and soaked up his comforting presence and smell.
“How’d it go?”
“Good, I think. I’m so tired I can’t be sure.”
“I bet you got it. I’ve got a good feeling about this. Me, you, New York. It’s the start of something big.”
Guilt slammed into me harder than the exhaustion.
“You want to split a medium pepperoni and sausage?”
“Wait, Richard, I need to tell you something.”
He tilted his head to the side. “What is it?”
I took a drink of the water waiting on the table for me. Always so considerate.
“I kissed Finn. Or well, actually he kissed me.” I’d rehearsed it a dozen different ways. Adding in, ‘it meant nothing’ and ‘it was all him’ but those were lies and I needed Richard to have all the facts. We were starting a new life together and I wanted to do so with nothing between us.
The lines around his mouth turned down and he studied me before he said, “I knew that guy was bad news. You never should have let him stay with you.”
I considered sticking up for Finn, but that just felt like another betrayal.
“You’re right. You told me it was a bad idea and I didn’t listen. I truly didn’t mean for this to happen.”
Richard was quiet, eyes fixed on the table as he nodded slowly letting this new information sink in. Analyzing it, dissecting it – that was how Richard handled problems, with lots of careful consideration. That had always pleased me because in some way it made me feel like I’d been a careful consideration.
“Do you…” He paused, re-thinking the question. “Are we okay? Is this about us moving in together? Have you changed your mind?”
“No.” I took a deep breath. “I mean yes we’re okay, but no I haven’t changed my mind. It was…”
Don’t say a mistake. Don’t say a mistake.
“A mistake.”
God, how cliché.
“I’m sorry. I should have listened to you when you voiced your concern about him staying.”
He smiled, a sort of forced but doing his best to move forward, type of grin. “Okay. If you say it didn’t mean anything then let’s move on.”
“That’s it?” Talk about looking a gift horse in the mouth, why couldn’t I just keep my mouth shut?
“Should there be more? I mean, I was worried about the guy. I saw the way he looked at you and I just knew he was going to try something, which he ended up doing, but now he’s out of our lives forever and we can forget about him.”
Forget about him. Why did I not think it would be that easy?
After lunch I went with Richard to his office. They were still working on building out offices and cubicles, but it was coming together. Mid tour he got called into a meeting and I sat in his office scrolling through my phone. I froze when I saw Finn’s name. I opened it, heart racing.
November 18, 1:21 p.m.
From: [email protected]
Subject: Sorry
I’m all moved out. My buddy Foster is letting us stay with him tonight and then he’s helping me move into the new place tomorrow. Kitty is wandering around meowing. I think she’s looking for you. I hope the interview went well. I’m sure you knocked it out of the park. I didn’t get a chance to thank you again for everything…so thanks. I’m sorry for kissing you.
Finn
P.S. I’m not really sorry.
P.P.S. I’d like to do it again.
He wanted to do it again? That made my heart flutter in my chest, but also kind of pissed