Is It Any Wonder (Nantucket Love Story #2) - Courtney Walsh Page 0,74

On her own, she certainly would’ve died just now. Okay, maybe not actual death, but she could’ve at least passed out.

“I’m sorry,” she said, inching back. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” One glance at the water, and the oxygen disappeared again.

Cody took her face in his hands. “Focus on me.”

Well, if you insist.

“Have you ever had a panic attack before?”

Louisa shook her head.

“Okay, you’re not dying. You’re fine. I’m going to get us back to the marina.”

He started to turn, but she clung to his arms, unable—or unwilling—to let him go.

He faced her again, kindness in his expression. “This was a bad idea. You should’ve said something.”

“I didn’t know.” Her eyes were wet with fearful tears, and she could only imagine what a disaster she seemed like to him. Her heart had kicked up again.

“Okay,” he said. “This is what we’re going to do. Tell me something you can touch.”

His T-shirt underneath her fingers was soft and worn. “Your shirt.”

“Great. Something else?”

She reached up and touched his chin. “Your skin.” It was smooth, like he’d just shaved that morning.

“Tell me something you hear.”

“Birds.” Her breath began to steady, her pulse to slow. “Seagulls.” She closed her eyes. “An airplane.” It was faint, but it was there.

“What can you smell?”

“Your aftershave.” She opened her eyes and scanned his face, which seemed neither embarrassed nor flattered that it was him she was latching on to in that moment.

“Good. Anything else?”

“Your shampoo.”

“And what do you taste?”

Her eyes fell to his lips, and she wondered if she could tell him what she wanted to taste. “Nothing.”

“Nothing?”

She shook her head. Her pulse and breathing had returned to normal. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” he said.

“No.” She looked up. “I’m sorry, Cody.”

It might’ve been the panic of the moment that heightened every single emotion she was having. Every nerve ending in her body seemed on high alert, and there was a good chance Louisa might burst into a ball of flames simply from sitting this close to Cody. Or it might’ve been that she still, after all this time, could easily fall in love with the man who’d stolen her heart all those years ago.

He was different, of course. He was older, more jaded. He wasn’t friendly and seemed impossible to know. But that didn’t stop her from wanting to know him. She wanted to know him more than anything.

Her breath seemed short all over again, but this time for very different reasons. She glanced down and found his hands still wrapped around hers.

He shifted. Was he uncomfortable? Was this awkward?

The wind tugged strands of her hair from the elastic she’d used to tie it into a ponytail, and it caught at the corners of her mouth. He reached over and pushed it away, smoothing it back with such kindness it overwhelmed her.

Eric had never been this kind or attentive. He’d always been in a hurry.

“Are you having nightmares?” Cody asked.

She nodded, willing away the knot at the back of her throat, which seemed to only tie itself tighter.

“How long?”

“Since the day you saved my life.”

He nodded. “Me too.”

“Nightmares?”

“Since the day my dad saved my life.”

Her heart lurched. How was it possible that he continued to go in the water? Continued to war with this vicious ocean and keep these taunting dreams at bay?

He picked up her hands and pressed them to his mouth. His eyes were closed, and he inhaled a breath deeper than any of the ones she’d just taken. “You should’ve told me.” Her hands were at his forehead, and he seemed to be working very hard to keep his distance.

Something inside her called out to him, begging him to draw her closer, to give in to this—whatever this was. They were meant to be together. Surely he felt that now? It was undeniable. It was obvious. The fish in the ocean below them could probably feel the electric currents radiating from their boat.

And then, as if his senses had been knocked back into him, he backed away and gently let go of her hands.

“Listen, we need to head back in,” he said. “So I want you to sit here and stare at your shoes. Don’t look up. Don’t even look at me, even though I know how much you like to stare.”

She started to protest, and he smiled.

“I’m kidding, Lou.”

Once again, she did as she was told. “I’m so embarrassed.”

“Don’t be. It happens.”

“Obviously not to you. You’re in this water every day. You even get in without a boat. You pull people