Internal Fixation - Tawdra Kandle Page 0,49

keep Mr. Brewer moving, increasing his overall health. He began seeing a massage therapist on a regular basis, and he’s also part of a support group specifically for patients living with pancreatic cancer.”

“He’s very enthusiastic about that group.” Alison spoke up finally. “He drives over an hour once a week to attend. He told me that it’s made a big difference in how he sees life and his illness.”

“Huh.” Deacon lifted one shoulder. “Who knew sitting around singing kumbaya with other patients could be so effective?”

“Actually, I think he said they use Tibetan prayer bowls and some kind of chanting—” Alison began.

“Why are you being such an ass right now?” I spoke right over her, glaring at Deacon. “I thought we’d made some headway after I got here. You saw how my recommendations worked. Most of them were effective. Why are you fighting me on this?” I dropped my tablet into my lap and flipped over both of my hands. “Is this some kind of head game for you? Or do you just need to assert your dominance again now that Alison’s leaving?”

“Um, you know, I don’t think this is an either/or scenario—” Alison fidgeted in her chair and tried again to say something reasonable. Unfortunately, Deacon and I both ignored her.

“I have no need to assert anything, Dr. Carson. I know my position at the hospital. This is the wing I worked hard to build, and I don’t need to prove to anyone that I belong here.”

“Don’t you, though?” I dropped my voice to a near whisper. “Because you know, Deacon, you pissed off a lot of people by the way you left town without any warning. Some of the folks you’re counting as allies might not be so quick to take your side anymore. If I were you, I’d watch my back.” I stretched my lips into a parody of a smile. “Actually, if I were you, I wouldn’t have run away just because I lost a patient.”

Finally, I’d hit a tender spot. Deacon’s jaw clenched. “That’s not why I left, and you know it.”

“Do I?” I tilted my head. “Enlighten me, please.”

His eyes flared, and for a fast moment, I was sure he was going to say something that I really didn’t want Alison to hear. But he gave his head a small shake.

“There was work for me in Slovenia. It was important for me to go.”

I laughed without any humor. “Surrrrre, there was. You keep telling yourself that. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

“You wouldn’t know anything about it. What I do with No Hungry Child is all about altruism and compassion.”

“And you’re saying I don’t have that? Blow it out your ass, Deacon.”

Alison jumped to her feet. “You know what, I think I’m going to leave. If you have questions about Mr. Brewer, all of my notes and reports are in the chart, and you have my contact information.” With that, she was gone, almost running out of the office like the devil was on her tail.

I should’ve taken Alison’s hasty departure as a sign that I needed to shut the hell up and get out of here, too. But I never was great about knowing when to cut my losses.

And it seemed, too, that Deacon wasn’t finished flaying me, either. “How could you say that I left because of Angela? What makes you think that’s why I went away?”

“Uh, because it’s true?” I rolled my eyes. “You couldn’t save her, and it devastated your pride.” Even as the words spilled out of my mouth, I knew that they weren’t true, strictly speaking. Deacon’s pride didn’t inform his work as much as his intense level of caring did. But I wasn’t going to admit that now.

“I wasn’t her only doctor, sweetheart,” Deacon growled at me. “If our care is to blame for the fact that Angela died, you share some of the load on that, too. At least I was doing everything medically possible. What did you offer her again? Oh, yeah. Singing at the top of her lungs for stress relief. Positive thoughts. Visualization. And surprise, surprise, none of those woo-woo ideas did a fucking thing to save her life.”

It stung, what he said. More than that, it struck a deep place of pain and insecurity. “Fuck you, Deacon,” I whispered.

“You already did, Emma.”

He sounded so damn smug that I couldn’t stand it. I stood up, almost stumbling as I tried to get out of the room as fast as I could. I was