nothing.” Luke thought of asking her if she would have felt it was a lot of fuss about nothing if it had been her ass. Nicky might have said it, but he wasn’t Nicky.
She gave him the fake smile he was finding ever more horrible. “You’re learning to behave, and that’s wonderful. Here’s a token. In fact, take two. I’m feeling generous today.”
He took them.
Later, standing in the shower with his head bent and water running through his hair, he cried some more. He was like Helen in at least one way; he wanted all this to be a dream. He would have given anything, maybe his very soul, if he could wake up to sunlight lying across his bed like a second coverlet and smell frying bacon downstairs. The tears finally dried up, and he began to feel something other than sorrow and loss—something harder. A kind of bedrock, previously unknown to him. It was a relief to know it was there.
This was no dream, it was really happening, and to get out of here no longer seemed enough. That hard thing wanted more. It wanted to expose the whole kidnapping, child-torturing bunch of them, from Mrs. Sigsby all the way down to Gladys with her plastic smiles and Zeke with his slimy rectal thermometer. To bring the Institute down on their heads, as Samson had brought the temple of Dagon down on the Philistines. He knew this was no more than the resentful, impotent fantasy of a twelve-year-old kid, but he wanted it, just the same, and if there was any way he could do it, he would.
As his father liked to say, it was good to have goals. They could bring you through tough times.
10
By the time he got to the caff, it was empty except for a janitor (FRED, his nametag said) mopping the floor. It was still too early for lunch, but there was a bowl of fruit—oranges, apples, grapes, and a couple of bananas—on a table at the front. Luke took an apple, then went out to the vending machines and used one of his tokens to get a bag of popcorn. Breakfast of champions, he thought. Mom would have a cow.
He took his food into the lounge area and looked out at the playground. George and Iris were sitting at one of the picnic tables, playing checkers. Avery was on the trampoline, taking mildly cautious bounces. There was no sign of Nicky or Helen.
“I think that’s the worst food combo I ever saw,” Kalisha said.
He jumped, spilling some of his popcorn out of the bag and onto the floor. “Jeepers, scare a person, why don’t you?”
“Sorry.” She squatted, picked up the few spilled pieces of popcorn, and tossed them into her mouth.
“Off the floor?” Luke asked. “I can’t believe you did that.”
“Five-second rule.”
“According to the National Health Service—that’s in England—the five-second rule is a myth. Total bullshit.”
“Does being a genius mean you have a mission to spoil everyone’s illusions?”
“No, I just—”
She smiled and stood up. “Yankin your chain, Luke. The Chicken Pox Chick is just yankin your chain. You okay?”
“Yes.”
“Did you get the rectal?”
“Yes. Let’s not talk about it.”
“Heard that. Want to play cribbage until lunch? If you don’t know how to play, I can teach you.”
“I know how, but I don’t want to. Think I’ll go back to my room for awhile.”
“Consider your situation?”
“Something like that. See you at lunch.”
“When the ding-dong goes,” she said. “It’s a date. Cheer up, little hero, and gimme five.”
She raised her hand, and Luke saw something pinched between her thumb and index finger. He pressed his white palm to her brown one, and the folded scrap of paper passed from her hand to his.
“Seeya, boy.” She headed for the playground.
Back in his room, Luke lay down on his bed, turned on his side to face the wall, and unfolded the square of paper. Kalisha’s printing was tiny and very neat.
Meet Maureen by the ice machine near Avery’s room ASAP. Flush this.
He crumpled the paper, went into the bathroom, and dropped the note into the bowl as he lowered his pants. He felt ridiculous doing this, like a kid playing spy; at the same time he didn’t feel ridiculous at all. He would have loved to believe there was at least no surveillance in la maison du chier, but he didn’t quite believe it.
The ice machine. Where Maureen had spoken to him yesterday. That was sort of interesting. According to Kalisha, there were several places in Front