Inevitable (King Crime Family #2) - J.L. Beck Page 0,51

to talk about problems. I simply deal with them in a different manner.

“There is nothing to talk about, Enzo. You are who you are, and I made a mistake thinking you had changed.”

“Changed? What the hell would make you think I had changed?”

“You…” She shoves against my chest with far more strength than I knew she had, “you’re just so dumb. You don’t even absorb anything…” Frustration laces her words, and I’m unsure if I should talk or not.

“I thought you would change for us. For some reason, I thought when all this was over, we would be able to be together. I thought maybe you would leave your old life behind for me.” She seems surprised by her own confession, and I’m shocked into silence.

“I—” What am I supposed to say to that? I can’t ever just walk away from the mafia. This isn’t a fucking career choice, and the fact she makes it seem like it baffles me.

“You think this is what I want? You think I want to be this person? You think I want to drag your feelings all over the place and kill people? Hell, I’m killing myself in the process, Amara,” I huff the words out, every single word a lash meant to be against her skin.

“I thought—I mean—couldn’t we have—” Her words aren’t making sense, but I know exactly what she is trying to say.

“No, we can’t. I’ll never be normal. I’ll never live in the suburbs and have a nine to five job. I plan on winning this war and taking my rightful place once again.”

Her face grows redder with every word I say, and my heart is bleeding for her…for the future we may or may not have.

“I never asked for you to be perfect, Enzo.” She shoves against my chest, getting in my face. “I simply thought you finally realized…” She shakes her head.

“Realized what?”

“It’s not important. I was a fool to have these thoughts. I thought you changed, after all the things you said to me. I hoped you would become someone I want you to be. Or maybe I just saw a glimpse of the real you?”

“I am who I am. This is me. The monster in the flesh before you.” I push her back until she is against a wall with nowhere to run.

“You are a shell of the man you could be. You simply exist because dealing with the pain of what happened had been too much. Think whatever you want, Lorenzo King, but know you can’t hide who you really are. I’ve already had a taste of the man underneath, and I will do anything I can to never let him go.”

“There isn’t any saving me, Amara. There is no stopping whatever will happen from happening. I helped you through your loss because it was my fault. It was my jo—”

“Just shut up already.” She stuns me into silence once more. I grit my teeth so hard I’m afraid my jaw will shatter. “It’s my fault your mother’s dead. So why not hate me, too? Why not fucking ruin it all because you can’t move on?”

She’s seething, her tears of hurt turning into tears of anger. I’ve caused this destruction without even meaning to. I knew from the start I would break her, hurt her, and still, I’ve tried. I tried to be so much more than what I was, but she can’t expect me to be a completely different person.

“I don’t know what to say,” I mutter, astounded at her behavior and how the night’s events have played out.

“Nothing. Say nothing because when this is all over, I will be the one to walk away from you, not the other way around. And don’t you dare tell me I can’t leave. I will fucking leave. I’d rather slit my own wrists than stay with you!”

She could have sucker punched me in the balls, and I wouldn’t have been as shocked. Her words hurt me more than anything I could have imagined. She has said similar things to me before. Telling me she hates me and that she wants to leave. But she never meant them. Not until now.

She would rather die than stay with me.

Giving me one final shove, I stumble backward, stunned by what she just told me. Then she’s running, leaving me. In the back of my mind, a little voice tells me to run after her, to bring her back to me and make her love me, but my body is