say when Mary Katherine couldn’t keep the tears down with the usual “sticks and stones” advice. But Debbie Dunham was the worst. When it came to Christians, she cheered for the lions. So, when Mary Katherine graduated from her Catholic middle school to the public high school, she had found the transition more than difficult. In the end, being a true believer was not an easy path in a multiple-choice world.
But the good thing about Catholic guilt was that it worked both ways. Mary Katherine’s perfect attendance, straight A’s, extra credit when she already had a 99, and 2020 SAT score eventually wore down her father. Eventually, even he had to admit that he had the most responsible daughter a man could ever hope to have. He allowed her to take her driver’s test. She aced it! Thank you, Jesus. And when her permanent license came in the mail, her picture was drop-dead gorgeous. She was guilty because vanity is a sin. But this quickly passed. Because she was seventeen. She had her license. It was senior year. She was applying to Notre Dame. Life was endless with the possibilities of freedom.
She had to make it home by midnight.
Or else she was going to ruin it all.
The clock read 11:54 p.m.
“God dammit!” she said, then immediately crossed herself.
“Gosh darnit,” she corrected, hoping it would be enough.
Mary Katherine retraced her mistake. She had met Doug at the movie at 9:30. The theater manager said the running time was two hours. That would have brought her to 11:30. It would be 11:27 if she left before the credits ended, which made her feel guilty because those people work so hard. But either way, she had plenty of time, right? But the theater kept playing commercials. And more trailers for Bad Cat 3D (as if we needed another one!). By the time the movie started, she actually forgot what movie they were supposed to see. She wanted to see the new romantic comedy from Disney. But oh, no. Doug needed his disaster movie.
Stupid Doug.
Why do the smartest boys like the dumbest movies? Doug had gotten straight A’s since kindergarten. He would be valedictorian and get into every college he applied to—even the secular ones. But he just had to see the world almost destroyed again.
“And no, Doug,” she said aloud to herself in the car, practicing for a fight she would never actually start, “I don’t like it when you put the Junior Mints in the popcorn. I don’t think it tastes better at all!”
The clock read 11:55 p.m.
God dammit!
Mary Katherine considered her options. She could exceed the speed limit, but if she got a ticket, she would be grounded for even longer. She could blow off a stop sign or two, but that was even worse. The only plan that made sense was going on Route 19, but her father forbade her from driving on highways. “Honor thy father and thy mother” worked on most days, but this was an emergency. It was either jump on Route 19 for two minutes or be late.
She turned onto the highway.
The traffic was so fast. Her heart beat with all of the cars rushing by in the left lane with her doing the legal 45 miles per hour in the right. She couldn’t risk a ticket. No way. Especially on Route 19. Her father would take her license away for that. And she would never drive her mother’s Volvo again.
“God,” she said, “if You get me home by midnight, I promise to give extra money to the collection plate this Sunday.”
After she said that, something gripped her. It was an old guilt. An old fear. The first time she’d thought it was after Doug and she went parking near Mill Grove Elementary School last Christmas. They were tongue kissing, and out of nowhere, Doug touched her left breast over the fuzzy sweater her grandmother had given her. It only lasted a second, and he claimed he slipped. But she knew better. She was very upset with him. But the truth was, she was more upset with herself.
Because she liked it.
She would never tell Doug that. But when she went home that night, she couldn’t stop herself from replaying the moment over and over. Thinking about his hands under her shirt and over her bra. And under her bra. And naked. She was so guilty that she actually thought she could get pregnant from Doug’s hand on top of her fuzzy sweater. She knew that was