love you, too, but Nikki is also right. You’ve gotta find balance. You can’t rightfully talk about Nikki.”
I knew I was wrong, but I was irritated. Here I was, exhausted as all hell, while my well-rested friends told me about myself. “Fine. I’ll go home and speak to my man right now.”
“Wait, we aren’t finished.” Raina raised a finger in the air. “Don’t get all pissy because Nikki dished it back. Let’s just finish the meeting.”
“I’m sorry, but,” I swung the purse strap across my shoulder, “I’ve gotta go cater to my man.” I bowed my head in submission as I paraphrased the popular Destiny’s Child song. “I’ll see y’all in a few weeks.”
I stormed out of the house, so unlike myself, and didn’t rest until I reached my car.
Maybe it was a good thing I was leaving early. I could surprise Darren, maybe even cook him something nice to eat.
I hyped myself up on being a better wife and squelched down the feeling of being a terrible friend. I’d apologize to my friends later.
When I returned home, I had a pep in my step. I promised myself I’d cook Darren a nice meal, seduce him, and give him a little sumthin’ sumthin’.
I opened the door and was not surprised when I didn’t find him in the living room. He was most likely in his man cave in the basement. “Darren, I’m home!” I yelled as I stomped down the steps.
I didn’t hear him respond, but someone else did. A chill slid over my skin, so intense goose bumps broke the surface.
I heard a moan. A long moan followed by, “Right there, Daddy!”
The chill became a tundra, yet my heart sped. I gripped the railing. This couldn’t be happening. Not to me. Not to us. An electrical prod shocked my system. I stumble-ran the rest of the steps and nearly toppled on the slippery carpet. I flung open the door.
“Aha!” My chest heaved as my attention darted around the room.
There was my husband, stroking himself to two women on dual computer monitors.
His face flitted between shock and embarrassment.
“What in the hell, Darren?” I stomped to his computer monitor as he scrambled to pull up his pants, which were pooled around his feet. “Is this what you do while I’m busting my ass for exams?” I scanned his computer.
After he halfway fastened his pants, he tried to close down the screens.
“Oh hell, no.” I slapped his hands out of the way and took a look at the damning evidence—a screen with clips of women with big asses. On the other monitor was an email from his old college buddy. The email was a picture of a woman in nothing but a Santa hat. His friend asked if Darren had been naughty or nice. Darren responded that he’d be a bad boy for her. Son of a bitch!
“Oh, really?” I swung my head and seared him with an angry look. “You’re so bad now?” I yelled, but tears were next. I could feel the stinging tide of emotions rise. This wasn’t the man I married. I wasn’t so naïve that I didn’t realize men and women watched porn, but to share pictures—naked pictures of women with his friends, his married friends—was the final straw.
“Who are you?” I backed away from him. Well, I tried. My legs were gelatin.
He stood, still fumbling with his pants. “I’m sorry, Kara, I—”
“You do this with your friends?”
“Yes. I’m sorry. We just do it for fun.”
“F-for fun?” The anger was rising again. “You share pictures of women. Probably saving it to your hard drive and saying nasty, degrading things? That’s your definition,” I pointed to the screen, “of fun?”
He was silent, but his eyes were pleading. Usually his warm brown eyes tugged at my insides, but I was empty.
“Are you . . .” I cleared my tear-clogged throat. “Are you cheating on me?”
“Never,” he whispered, as if it were a vow. “I would never cheat on you, Kara. You’re my everything. I love you.”
“I’m obviously not your everything. Y-you have this secret life where you jerk yourself off in a dark room and share dirty pics with your boys. I don’t know you.”
“You can check my phone, baby.” He grabbed the phone from his desk. “Right now. Check it and you’ll know I’m not cheating. I go to work and I come home. Yeah, sometimes I blow off steam with the guys, but I never meant to hurt you.” He raised his palms in the air. “I