If I Could - B. Celeste Page 0,73
the novel is vaguely familiar to me. It was a night we spent at Terry’s. She asked me what I had planned for the weekend, and I told her there was a book I’d been wanting to reread, so she listened to me talk about the plot with apt attention. “You’re one of the few people who will listen to me ramble about literature without getting a glaze in your eyes,” I muse, lips tugging up at the corners as I stare at the slightly ripped cover. “Lawrence tries, but he’s about as interested in Baldwin’s heartbreaking story as I am with anything sports related, so it seems fair.”
I know the moment it clicks with her, her big green eyes lighting as she scopes out my face with wonder.
Taking a deep breath, I set the book down on my desk. “Lawrence isn’t just my friend.”
There’s no sadness in the smile, or rejection in her eyes when she answers, “I’m getting that. And that…that makes me really happy for you, Reece. Can I be honest?”
Feeling the steady rise of emotion that I know will choke me up unless I say something, I clear my throat. “Of course.”
Her tongue dips past the corner of her lips for a split second, her brain formulating her response carefully. “I think I always sort of guessed, but I never fully knew for sure. It’s not something you can just ask, even a friend. Although, I won’t lie, I always thought about asking if you were…”
“Gay,” I interject, smiling softly. “I’m learning it’s not a bad word.”
“Gay,” she breathes, slowly nodding.
“Somebody told me that labels don’t define a person, and I’m slowly understanding that too.”
“Would that somebody happen to be an ex-baseball player?” she teases easily.
I chuckle. “Perhaps.”
Her hand brushes mine. “I’m happy for you, Reece. Ren is a good guy.”
Something in my chest shifts, a strong sense of belonging and exuberance taking over, easing every tight muscle in my body that froze the second she looked at me with knowing eyes. I’m not naïve enough to think all conversations about this will go as well as this one, but it’s an encouraging start. “Yeah, he really is.”
Michelle’s fingers squeeze mine before she lets go, and I can tell she means what she said when I see the genuine shine in her eyes as she picks up the book. “I’m going to read this to make sure I get the best visual for what we want to do for the wall.”
A playful smile quirks my lips. “I thought you told me you read it already?”
Unabashed, she shrugs. “I lied to impress you.” Her shoulder bumps mine in a joking manner as she tucks the book into her bag. “I guess it wasn’t going to work anyway.”
All I can do is chuckle when she waves and leaves me to my thoughts, and all I can think is, one down, the world to go.
Yet, in that instance, the only person I want to share any news with is already walking into my classroom with a sexy swagger that I’m finally letting myself appreciate in a pair of pants that I happen to know hug his ass perfectly.
He does a double take when he sees me, stopping halfway in the door. “Since when do you wear glasses?”
I push the nose piece up for the third time since sliding them on to do a little work before I called it quits for the day. I don’t wear them all the time, but if a student decides to write in microscopic letters, they’re a necessity. “Since always.”
Ren gives me an appreciative once over again before a slow, sensual smile stretches over half his lips. “Is it weird I’m hard right now?”
Choking on my laughter, I shake my head at his bluntness.
“Come on,” he says, pulling my gaze away from where it drifted on the tiniest uplift in his slacks. “I have our first date planned out, and I’d rather not be late. Got to make a good impression, after all.”
“Is that so?” I play along, trying hard not to smile at his theatrics. When Lawrence told me that he wanted a formal date just the two of us before I met Della, I was a combination of ecstatic and nervous, even though we spend most of our time together already.
It’s different when the world can see you consumed in another person, unable to hide lingering eyes and yearning smiles and desperate hands that want to hold, caress, and touch another person.