I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day - Milly Johnson Page 0,75

go together, he snored and twitched even when he was deeply sleeping. ‘Is it okay if I come and sit with you though?’

‘Of course,’ said Charlie. ‘Just don’t expect me to converse. I’ve also been having a think about where you can scatter me. Best to cremate me first.’ He nudged Robin who let out a spurt of laughter, despite the tears pricking his eyes now.

‘Don’t, Charlie.’

‘We could always find humour in anything, you and me, Robin.’

‘Not in this.’

‘I want maximum black regalia, no bright colours or rainbows. I want full blown gravitas, black horses, no flowers except from you – something with white roses in it and feel free to stink the place out with Stargazer lilies, I’ve always liked those. Donations in lieu of flowers to The Little Hospice down the road. This is all in the letter stapled to my will.’

‘Then we don’t need to talk about it.’

‘I want to. I need to explain so there’s no surprises for you, no shocks. Your brain will be the equivalent of a mashed beetroot. Anyway, I want Father Derek to conduct the service in Tuckwitt Church, not that awful Father Aubrey who talks ad infinitum and bores everyone stupid, then I’ll go on to the crematorium by myself and—’

‘You will do no such thing.’ Robin refused that request, point blank.

‘Yes I will. You say goodbye to me at the church, then go and play host at Tuckwitt Manor. People will need to be fed and watered by then and you should mingle, it’ll cheer you up. As for my ashes… in the letter it says I want them to go at the bottom of the garden but I’ve changed my mind. I’d like to be sprinkled with my mother and father in the sea at Whitby. I don’t think I’m going to be leaving Yorkshire alive, Robin. I shall end in the place I started.’

‘Don’t be so bloody stupid.’

‘There’s a certain serendipity in dying in the area in which you were born. It’s as if I’ve come home for that reason.’ Charlie had said his goodbyes to the south when he set off. He wouldn’t be back this time, he knew it.

‘Don’t forget to keep up with my donations to the Yorkshire greyhound rescue centre,’ he continued.

‘I won’t.’

‘Oh, and don’t let Rosa convince you that I want that “Do not stand at my grave and weep” poem read out at the service, I fucking hate it.’

Robin chuckled again, even as his tears fell.

‘I promise.’

‘She’ll lie and tell you it was one of my favourite poems. It isn’t. It’s morbid. I want a limerick. There was an old jeweller called Charles. Who traded in diamonds and parls… but he wasn’t one for the garls. Something like that.’

‘I am not doing that. I’ll find something classy.’

‘I wish I could hear your eulogy. Will you speak of me in glowing terms?’

‘No, I’ll say you were a ridiculous old fart.’

‘You’ll do me proud, I know you will. I’d like to be there at my own funeral. I will do my best to attend.’

‘Well sit at the back, otherwise I’ll have a heart attack and end up joining you,’ said Robin. ‘The two of us can end up in the sea at Whitby then, distributed from the same urn.’

Charlie smiled. ‘I will try and come back and let you know I’m all right, but it won’t be in the form of a white feather or a robin or a Red Admiral because that’s overdone, isn’t it? What shall it be then? Let’s decide now.’

‘A diamond dropping from the sky. One big enough to give me concussion.’

‘Too obvious.’ Charlie thought for a moment. ‘I’ll leave a cherry on the floor somewhere.’

‘Oh very clever, so someone slips on you and goes flying.’

‘A cherry, not a banana skin, Robin. All right, something else then.’ His eye caught the beautiful scene framed by the large picture bedroom window. ‘I know, I’ll come down to see you in snow form. You can stand by the French window and watch me fall gently into the garden.’

‘I’ll be in Bermuda with my new lover for the winter months so I’ll miss you dropping by, sorry.’

‘Freak snow, like this. You won’t want me popping by every five minutes, you’ll have your new life to lead. But when the weathermen are scratching their heads because the snow is unexpected, you can presume I’m partly to blame for it.’

Their volley of banter stalled now. Robin couldn’t respond because his heart was breaking in his