my car, avoiding what could have been a fatal crash. Taking a deep breath, I maneuvered the car onto the right shoulder and flipped on the emergency lights.
Zane, are you there? Say something. Please. I’m so sorry. God, I’m so sorry. I would have never done it without the magic. Please, you have to believe me.
I waited, and waited. Realizing I was already late getting to the park, but unable to move.
Oh, I believe you.
Zane! Thank God!
I wouldn’t thank me just yet. The kissing part hurts, but not as bad as the lying. You put me through hell over my supposed dishonesty, but have lied to me all week. I thought I’d found a woman I could trust. A woman I could spend my life with. You’re not that woman.
Panicked by the coldness in his voice, I did something I’d sworn never to do: I begged a man. Please, don’t say that. It will never happen again. I promise. I need you.
I realized right then that I was still lying. Alcuin was lying, and Luke too. Going to Portland was yet another secret between us. Somehow I’d put the Valamir situation in a different category, but it was all the same. Lies. Betrayal. He was right.
He couldn’t trust me.
Forget what I told you about the mating ceremony. I’ll protect you until this is over, but after that you’re on your own. So am I.
Zane! Wait! Please!
He reinforced the mental brick wall he’d constructed when we’d first met. I was blocked out — maybe forever.
Alcuin found me slouched over the steering wheel, sobbing. He flashed into the passenger seat and rested a cold hand on my shoulder.
“I was worried. I tried to call Zane, but he didn’t answer. What happened?”
I lifted my head. My eyes felt tight and swollen. I didn’t dare look in the rearview mirror for fear of what I’d see in the reflection. “I told him.”
“About this?” Alcuin said without emotion.
“About Valamir. I was ready to accept the mating mark and wanted Zane to know everything. Well, almost everything. That’s the problem. The lies. We both kept secrets, and rather than protecting each other, we’ve destroyed everything.” The more I talked, the more my grief transformed into anger.
Why was it my burden alone to carry? He’d lied more than once. He’d taken my virginity without my knowledge. In my drunken state, I’d consented, but that didn’t count. Not really.
We’d both theoretically had good reasons for our deceit, yet neither of us was able to forgive the other — so much for love.
One thing I remembered from my church-going days was that forgiveness was a huge part of love, the most important part. If we couldn’t forgive each other, there was no point in me shouting some ridiculous promise at the moon. Divorce wasn’t something I wanted, but considering the situation, no one would blame me.
Zane was right. We needed to finish what we started. Find the killer and get on with our lives. We’d known each other for just one week, for crying out loud. I was being ridiculous.
“Do you want me to talk to him?” Alcuin asked, his face still void of emotion.
Did I? No. As far as I was concerned, we were over. “Don’t bother. I’m going to Portland, and then I plan to solve this mystery like Nancy Drew.”
Alcuin’s blank-faced mask cracked. “Nancy who?”
“You don’t know who Nancy Drew is?” I guessed vampires didn’t read much.
“Should I?”
“She’s only the greatest ever girl detective. When there’s a mystery to solve, you can count on Nancy Drew.”
“Should we contact her?” Alcuin asked, his excitement rising.
That was all it took to send me over the edge. My tears vanished in a wave of uncontrollable laughter. Maybe I’d trade places with the Smart kid and let them experiment on me instead. My mental state was in serious question.
Alcuin had told me to curb my emotions the night we’d first met. That particular memory added fuel to my hysterics. When I caught a glimpse of the baffled expression on his face, it acted like a match thrown on gasoline, sending me even further over the edge.
“Why do you laugh like a maniac?” Alcuin clasped my face between his hands and stared into my eyes.
Dammit! Now he was using mind magic on me, trying to calm me down.
It was working.
After a few minutes of strange staring, I’d reestablished a sense of sanity, and was grateful for Alcuin’s interference. He’d saved me a ton of time and trouble. If everyone had a