How to Elude a Vampire (VRC Vampire Related Crimes #2) - Alice Winters Page 0,17
to carry her around in?” Brooks asks as he and Karsyn head off toward their cars. Brooks is pretending to swing a purse around as Karsyn laughs and laughs.
“I will strangle you with the strap if either of you gets me a pet purse,” I growl.
“What color do you think he’ll like?” Brooks asks Karsyn like they’re big ol’ asshole buddies now.
“I will destroy both of you, and I won’t even shed a tear. Your pleas will be meaningless to my ears.” My threats seem to be ineffective as they snicker to each other.
“Does he really think he can threaten anyone holding that creature?” Brooks asks.
I stuff “that creature” into the car and head inside, praying no one else witnesses the travesty that has become my life. Should I have put it in the trunk? Will someone else see it? Can I convince them I’m planning on eating it? Will the authority I’ve spent three hundred years building up evaporate in the span of one hour if one more person sees me with… that thing?
No. I’m so overpowered that I even look lethal with a fucking pocket pet.
Right?
This is ridiculous.
I sign DeGray’s paperwork and am thrilled when I return to my car and see that there isn’t a crowd gathered around my vehicle while questioning what’s happened to my sanity. Instead, the tiny thing has somehow managed to get her body up on the dashboard where she’s squished between the windshield and dashboard, yowling. I could hear her as soon as I stepped out the door. Clearly, she was convinced that this was the end of her life. No one was ever coming back for her.
Which… is slightly sad, but I don’t care enough to be too sad. I pull open the door and sit down, and she dives off the dashboard onto my lap where she wiggles before flopping on her side so I can rub her stomach. She’s whimpering and whining with excitement at my return.
“Dammit, don’t be cute.”
She’s using that cute card so damn hard. I’ve never seen a monster use their cute card like this besides Finn.
“I’m sorry I left you in the car. We’re not leaving you for life,” I say as I head home.
While I wait for Finn, I pull out some of Artemus’s stuff that he doesn’t use. So I get Artemus’s crate out while she bugs Artemus. He just stares at her in wonder as she chews on his jowls and tugs on his ears.
“He could eat you,” I remind her as I set the crate up before realizing the crate is massive compared to her. So is the bowl, the leash, the toys…
But there are zero fucks given as she grabs a toy four times her size and trots off with it.
The door opens just as I’m finishing everything.
Artemus takes off barking, startling the tiny dog who runs to me for comfort.
“Artie, my sweetie sugar pie, did your daddy torture you by not giving you a treat on top of supper?” Finn asks as he comes around the corner and his eyes lock on the rat… I mean dog. “You got the dog!”
He drops to his knees and the dog rushes over, ecstatic she’s found someone new to become best friends with.
And I realize that it’s all worth it. This is why I do things like this because there’s nothing better than seeing the smile that lights up Finn’s entire face. Nothing Brooks or Karsyn could say to me could make me regret a moment of this. Because when Finn is happy, I feel like nothing else matters. This is the only thing that does.
Even if I’ve added an ugly rat to the family.
“I can’t believe you even went and got her for me. That’s so cute,” he says as he scoops her up and rushes over to me before pulling me into a hug. “Thank you.”
I let out a grumble but squeeze him to me. “You’re welcome. I’m just happy to see you so excited.”
He gives me that smile that makes everything bad in the world disappear, before pushing into me and giving me a kiss. “You’ve turned into such a sucker. So, I’ll let you name her.”
“Aw, thank you for bestowing upon me the greatest opportunity ever. I am truly blessed,” I say as dryly as possible.
Finn beams at me. But it’s a cocky beam that tells me he’s loving every moment of torturing me.
I look at the creature and give her the best name I can think of.