no comfort and would not take root in her memory. So Beth spoke a silent memorial of her own to honor her father. And to drown out her mother’s opinion of her.
I’ll remember the strength of your arms when I’m weak, carrying me.
Danny let her lean on him. Their mother stood opposite, head bowed, eyes closed, lost in her own memories. Levi stood at a distance, his face turned toward the pasture, with them but separate.
I’ll remember the scent of your sweat when I work, the calluses on your hands when I ache.
A gentle breeze stirred the trees above and the shrubs below.
I’ll remember your love for God, and for all the wounded people of the world.
Eric finished, and no one said anything. Danny pulled the upright shovel out of the ground and slid it into the loose dirt.
I’ll remember the sound of your laugh when I can’t breathe. I’ll remember the sound of your silence when I need wisdom.
The coffin sounded hollow when the earth that poured off the shovel’s blade struck it.
Danny thrust the scoop back into the pile, more forceful this time, taking a heavier load. Beth watched him, feeling his heartache like a physical pain.
I’ll remember your love for my mother. I’ll look for you in my brothers.
Levi shoved his hat down onto his brow and left them.
I’ll believe that you told me the truth: that goodness is stronger than evil, that weakness is greater than strength, that humility is a measure of greatness. I’ll remember your God.
There was a second shovel lying in the patchy wild grass where Levi had left it the day before. Beth retrieved it and began to help Danny. Her little brother’s face was wet with tears, but his jaw was strong and his arms moved with the precision of a metronome. She could not keep up with him, but he didn’t seem to mind.
It seemed she’d only been working a few minutes when Jacob took her shovel, and Roy took Danny’s. But her brow was sweaty and her black cotton blouse was stuck to her back. She stepped into the shade of the nearest tree. The Davises worked shoulder to shoulder and undid the work that Levi had done, this time with her father’s body under the rubble. Beth clung to the Bible’s promise that his spirit had gone on to heaven.
Eventually Pastor Eric and Emory drifted away to the other hole and began to fill it in without needing to be asked. Wally was already there, filling the pit one scoop at a time. Beth had seen him arrive discreetly during Eric’s eulogy. Then Jacob and Roy finished, and silently left Rose and Beth standing alone with the fresh mound between them.
“I don’t see how we can repair this fracture,” her mother said.
Beth waited for her to explain. Dreaded the explanation.
“You are either in favor of your brother’s plan, or you’re against it.”
“How can I support—”
“You support it by admitting that what this family needs right now, more than anything, is to function as a unit.”
“Levi is taking advantage of—”
“Don’t you see, Beth? Don’t you see? What is happening right now isn’t about what’s right or wrong. There is no right or wrong, there’s only what’s necessary. We need each other. We have to stick together. When a family falls apart . . .”
Beth’s gaze lifted and went to the distant spot where she’d found Garner’s marker.
“Give me a chance to fix this in my own way,” Beth pleaded. “That’s exactly what Levi’s tried to do. He hasn’t handled this any differently.”
“No. I won’t let you break us up one misstep at a time.”
“Is that what you think I’m trying to do?”
“No more than anyone tries. That doesn’t mean I can’t prevent it.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying I think you need some time away from us, Beth.”
Beth examined each word, one at a time, in her mind.
“Think of it as your getting to go abroad for a season. When Levi and I close the deal with Sam, if you still want us then, come on home.”
“Where exactly do you want me to go?”
“You’re an adult. That’s for you to figure out.”
“I’m an owner. I won’t sell my share.”
“If you ever want to set foot on this property again, you’ll give me power of attorney for this purpose.”
“No.”
“Quit acting like a child!”
“You’re the one who’s breaking us up. I only want what Dad wanted.”
“I want you gone by the end of next week. I’ll have the attorney draw up papers