I wanted was attention. He said he’d be happy to give me some. He offered to take care of me.”
“That’s why you married him.”
Sydney shrugged. “I didn’t love him but he was a decent guy. I think he was gay and just never came out. We were married almost four months and we had half-hearted sex ten or twelve times. Craig was great to hang out with. He loved to read and talk about current events. He was interesting. And he listened to me. No one really had for years.”
Dash took her hand. “I guess it was hard to lose him.”
Sydney grew quiet. Being with Dash was a new start for her so she wanted to be honest. “It was harder than I would’ve expected. He was gone so quickly. I missed him. My mom. My brother.” Tears welled in her eyes. “Dad was vacationing in France and didn’t bother coming home for Craig’s funeral. I called to ask him if he would. He told me he was busy.”
“It seems really different now between the two of you. Seeing you interact, I would never have guessed you’d been estranged.”
She brushed a hand across her face to wipe away the spilled tears. “That’s the really weird thing. I left home. Married Craig. After that one call asking Dad to come to the funeral, I didn’t talk to him until last week. He acted as if no time had passed and that everything was fine between us. He welcomed me back like I was the Prodigal Son and offered me a job and has seemed so . . . . normal. So . . . Dad-like. Part of me celebrates this new phase in our relationship but the rest of me can’t figure it out.”
“What if you’re not meant to? Maybe Monty was searching for something like you were. Either he found it or he didn’t but he’s accepted what his life is now, without your mom in it. He probably was thrilled that you got in touch with him and doesn’t want to push you too hard and drive you away again.”
“Even though we didn’t speak for all those years, he told me he’d hired a PI who kept tabs on me. He knew where I went to college and law school. He knew where I worked and the city I lived in. In his own way, I guess he cared.”
Sydney knew she’d left out a huge chunk of her life but she wasn’t ready yet to talk about her second marriage and Wake. They sat in companionable silence. Dash didn’t press her about the second guy she slept with. She’d tell him eventually.
“Okay, I’ve spilled enough of my past. Quid pro quo, DeLauria.”
Dash stood and pulled her to her feet. “Let’s walk.”
◆◆◆
Dash liked that Sydney had filled in some of the blanks for him. He knew there were still huge gaps remaining but she didn’t need to tell him everything right away. She already seemed emotionally drained. He’d have to tamp down his curiosity about her second lover. For now.
As they strolled along the beach, he said, “I didn’t have the greatest childhood. Mom walked out on us when I was six. Dad never got over her leaving and drank to cope with it. It took him fifteen years but all the alcohol he consumed finally killed him. I’d just turned twenty-one.”
“I’m sorry, Dash. That had to be hard.”
“It was. Sports saved me. I played football and basketball. Worked year-round at a local grocery store from the time I was fourteen. And you know I sang in the choir.”
“That’s why you don’t drink,” Sydney said. “You didn’t when you met with my dad. Or at the cookout.”
“My father’s drinking was part of that decision.” He hesitated. “This is hard to talk about. I’ve never mentioned it to anyone.”
“Then don’t.” Her hand rubbed his back soothingly.
“No, I want to talk about it with you.” He thought back to that night that had given him nightmares for years. “After senior prom, my best friend and I took our dates to make out and drink. We did a lot of both. Eric was driving. How he made it back to town to drop off the girls, I don’t even remember. We were headed to his house when I fell asleep. The next thing I knew, I woke up two days later in a hospital. Eric had lost control of the car and was killed instantly.”
Sydney’s hand stopped. She wrapped him in her arms.