Holden's Resurrection (Gemini Group #6) - Riley Edwards Page 0,94
He told me he wanted to keep the baby and marry me. He was insistent. He was sympathetic and told me he knew it would take time for me to get over Holden, but in time he would make me love him. He told me he wanted to make me happy. He told me he already loved me.
Paul didn’t love me, he was obsessed. What kind of man pretended to be the father of a child that was not his to get the mother to marry him? Who did that?
He knew.
Nothing made sense.
Not a damn thing.
If the Towlers knew, why didn’t they use that to get the money?
“I’m gonna take Faith back to my house.” Macy’s soft voice pulled me from my thoughts. “She’s more than welcome to spend the night.”
“I should say goodbye.”
“No, honey, you shouldn’t.” There was motherly compassion in her eyes. “Trust me, you don’t want her seeing you like this. I promise we’ll take good care of her.”
I must’ve looked like hell if no one wanted Faith to see me.
“Thank you, Macy.”
“No need to thank me. We love you both.”
My throat started to tingle, therefore, I couldn’t speak so I nodded.
“When you’re ready to talk, all of us are ready to listen.” And with that, Macy left the living room and my eyes went back to Jameson.
His jaw was set in an angry clench and his eyes were focused on me. I couldn’t stop myself from squirming.
“I didn’t know,” I blurted out. “I would’ve told him. I never would’ve kept Faith from him. I swear, I had no idea.”
Jameson carefully masked his fury, and with a good amount of effort, I watched him force himself to relax.
There was a commotion in the other room, the front door opened, then closed, and silence stole over the room.
I glanced out the window to see Macy helping the girls into her SUV, Alec going to the driver’s side. Nixon and McKenna walked to Nix’s truck. Doors slammed and vehicles drove away. All of that happened surprisingly quickly. My daughter was being whisked away so she wouldn’t witness my meltdown.
I didn’t know if I was grateful or if I felt like the world’s worst mother. Shouldn’t I have been able to keep my shit together for the sake of my child?
“None of us think that about you, Charleigh. We know you’d never do that to Holden. And more, we know you wouldn’t do that to Faith. Holden knows that, too.”
“Does he?” I snapped.
“Hundred percent, he knows,” Weston assured me.
“Then why isn’t he here? Why’d he leave me, again? He begged me to fight for our future, he pleaded with me to forgive him for leaving me. But he left me, again.”
“I’m not making excuses for him,” Jameson started. “But, Charleigh, he didn’t leave you. He left so he could go somewhere and beat himself up. For him, this is the best and the worst day of his life. Finding out that Faith is his after all these years thinking she was Paul’s, but knowing the true depth of Paul’s betrayal, knowing that he denied a child that at the time he truly believed couldn’t be his, losing you and Faith, missing eight years of his daughter’s life.”
“And what about me? I just found out the depth of Paul’s betrayal, too. None of you understand the shame I’ve lived with thinking I slept with him. None of you understand the guilt I feel for wishing that night never happened. None of you understand how lonely I’ve been. How much I missed Holden. How fucking hurt I was.”
Shouldn’t the shame have been washed clean now that I knew the truth? Shouldn’t I feel better knowing I never had sex with Paul? But nothing felt better or good. It felt more screwed up. How stupid could I have been? How weak? Why didn’t I demand Holden take a DNA test?
Pride. I let my damn pride stand in the way. At the time, I thought Holden was rejecting me and the possibility the baby was his. His refusal to acknowledge the baby hurt so bad, I slithered away to lick my wounds and let my parents force me to marry Paul and stay quiet about Holden.
Even after Paul died, my parents pushed me to play the part of the grieving widow. A thought nagged the back of my mind, a hunch that wasn’t fully formed, but pieces started to click into place. The Towlers. My parents. Court appearances.