this guy really got a heart transplant as a baby and is still breathing?”
Protectiveness welled. Sometimes Jack could be so callous and brash.
There was just something about Jack’s tone that got under my skin.
Or maybe it was because that was where Evan really was.
Forever and ever under my skin.
Etched there.
Seared in the marrow and written in the bone.
“Can’t fuckin’ wait to see him,” Josiah cut in, glancing at me in the rear-view mirror like he was wondering if I concurred. “He’s cool as shit. You don’t like Evan then you’re basically a prick.”
His gaze slid back to Jack.
Leave it to Josiah to make it sound like praise when he was delivering a warning.
“If I had to pick, I’d definitely trade both of these assholes for Evan,” Carly said. “He’s pretty much that awesome.”
“Wow. Ruthless.” Josiah chuckled under his breath.
“Huh,” Jack mused, though it came out sounding more like an accusation, looking at me again. “You mean except for the fact he took off and left you all without a word, cool?”
Oh, this really was gonna be fun.
“Everyone deals with their shit in different ways,” Josiah said like he’d already long since forgiven Evan for what he’d done. Understood it from the get-go.
My teeth were rubbing my bottom lip raw, hands going itchy at the way Josiah phrased it. And I couldn’t help but remember the look on Evan’s face that night. I should have known he’d gone to a dark, dark place.
Should have known he wasn’t okay.
But the problem was, I hadn’t been okay, either.
Josiah turned on his right blinker, slowing as we came to the turn off that veered north at an angle to round back up toward the cliff end of the lake. This road was rougher and narrower where it led to the secluded spot on the opposite end of the busy campgrounds.
The SUV jostled down the bumpy trail.
The trees were different here.
Spindly and thin with white, chalky bark. Packed so tight together it looked like they were in standing formation. An army that stretched so high the tops got lost in the bright rays of sunlight that burned from the endless sky.
Road climbing higher, we rounded a bend to a clearing where a ton of familiar vehicles were already parked.
My daddy’s truck.
Ollie’s teal historic one sat next to it. A secret grin pulled at one side of my mouth when I remembered how Evan had salivated over that truck, claiming one day he would own it.
Uncle Broderick and Aunt Lillith’s Range Rover was parked at one side.
Next to it was Aunt Hope’s Volvo.
And there went my breath again. Nerves scattering like the leaves tumbling along the rocky ground.
You can do this, Frankie Leigh. You can do this. You’re a big girl. A brave girl.
But it was hard to convince myself of that when the wind kept gettin’ knocked out of me.
Josiah pulled to a stop in an open spot and put it in park. “This is it. Let’s get this party started, bitches.”
I climbed out and gave in to the shiver of excitement that crawled under the surface of my skin.
I loved it here. God, I loved it so much. This place filled with so many amazing memories. Cherished moments that I never wanted to give up.
I went to the back, pulled out my bag, slung it over my shoulder, and grabbed as many of the food bags as I could manage.
“What can I get?” Jack offered.
“If you could get the umbrella and tent, that would be great.”
“No problem. Just glad I’m here.” His dark eyes roved over me, like he was looking for an affirmation.
Guilt twisted up my stomach in a thousand knots.
I hadn’t even invited him. He’d just assumed, which I guessed I really couldn’t fault him for.
It was long since passed time that I should have started including him in family events.
But the sad truth was that I hadn’t. That I’d never felt ready and I was pretty sure that I never would be.
That should have been a warning right there.
But you know what they say . . .
Hindsight.
Even then, everything felt blurry. A daze of discomfort and these flickerings of joy that Evan had returned to where he belonged hazing up my sight and my mind.
Messing with my head.
Mixing up my heart.
I headed for the trail that twisted through the full bushes and the soaring trees. A breeze whistled through, dragging in the scent of the purple blazing star flowers that grew rampant in the fields.