Hita - Anita Claire Page 0,37
guy. While the other princesses are busy with their guys, Isabelle and I get together. We spend most of our time lamenting on our lack of decent men to date. I know she’s been hanging out with Paul, her on again off again college boyfriend. I hope she doesn’t go there again.
***
About a week later I get a call from “Dick,” Arav’s friend. He has an accent that sounds like a combination of British and Indian that’s been flattened out by living in the US. We agree that he’ll pick me up and we’ll go to dinner and a movie.
Since I’m not sure what to wear, I decide on jeans and a sweater. Juliette tells me boots can dress up jeans. Considering I don’t own any, I figure I’ll wear my ballerina flats instead of sneakers.
Arav was right, Dick is a tall guy, a bit over six foot. He, too, is wearing jeans, but paired with the kind of high quality button down shirt I only wear for interviews. He takes me to Sakoon, a nice Indian restaurant in downtown Mountain View. He reminds me of Juliette’s old boyfriend, Stephan. I’m not sure if it’s the accent or if he’s kind of pretentious. Anyway, the dinner starts out well. He’s not much of a talker and I’m not the most outgoing person, so we don’t say too much at first. Trying to bring him out, I figure I’ll start with something easy like his name.
“Dick isn’t a very Indian name. I assume it is short for something?” Thinking about it nothing comes up.
“It’s short for Diksheet.”
Of course I totally crack up. Finally mumbling out, “No way.”
He looks at me surprised, “Diksheet is perfectly proper name, it means one who attains Deeksha, a preparation for a religious ceremony.”
Trying to hold back the laughter I finally ask, “Do your parents speak English?”
“Of course, my family is educated.”
“Then how could they name their kid Dick-shit? Come on, they had to know what that means in English.”
“It’s not considered a funny name in India.”
“Yeah, but I bet your business card doesn’t have Dick-shit on it,” I say as I cover my mouth in an attempt not to giggle.
In a very practical voice he says, “I use Dik in this country, it’s easier for American’s to remember.”
Unable to stop myself I ask, “Did you pledge a fraternity?
He shakes his head. “I came to America for grad school. We don’t have the foolishness of fraternities in India.”
“Well that’s a good thing,” I earnestly tell him. “The brothers would have a field day with your name.”
He gives me an impenetrable look as my brain twirls and my mouth blurts out, “Hey wait, the fraternity brothers couldn’t even make fun of your name. How do you make fun of a name like Dick-shit?” I start laughing again and then grasp his arm, as I lean in. I tell him, “You’d, never have to suffer through a stupid nickname. You’d have the most popular name in the Greek system. All the brothers would love to call out, ‘Hey Dick-shit….’”
Dik looks at me mystified. “American’s don’t act as ridiculous when they find out about my given name as you currently are.”
With a big smile I proudly tell him, “Don’t you see, that’s the benefit of being American and Indian. American’s don’t want to be culturally insensitive, or even worse, racist. I have no false pretense. I can experience the full humor when Indian and American cultures collide.”
He looks at me like I’m somewhat insane as I realize that he’s as humorless as Anil. Too bad Anil didn’t have a name like Dick-shit. It sure would been fitting, and I’d have saved myself from making that whole crappy dinner before I found out he had no sense of humor.
Realizing that maybe I’m being rather insensitive with his name, I try to reign in my laughter as I say, “I’m surprised you haven’t gotten a better sense of humor with your name.”
He shakes his head before replying, “I’ve never really needed to.”
Needless to say, my sophomoric sense of humor with his name did not endear me to him. Now I can add another man to my list of those who will never call me back: Brandon, Gray, Anil, Dick-shit…. Damn, this list is getting long. Am I starting to sound like Lindsey Lohan?
Chapter 30 – Online Dating
After spending time with my family at Savi’s wedding, I decide to stay in California for Thanksgiving. Meredith and Sam live in an apartment located in