In His Kiss - Ava Alise Page 0,92

her in on my mother’s mental state. It’s been a hard month and I’ve tried my damnedest to take care of her. My father has been helping from afar but I believe this is more than we both can manage.

I gaze over to my dad as he stares down, so lovingly at Mom. She can’t speak. The mask covers her nose and mouth, but her eyes stay locked on him and she nods slowly, listening to his soothing words.

“It’s going to be okay, Della. You can breathe. Just close your eyes and breathe.”

A large tear rolls down the side of her face as she nods again and follows his directions. Gripping his hand and closing her eyes. A few minutes goes by and we watch as the other paramedic continues to take her vitals, reporting her health.

“She’s going to be fine,” she says, looking up to my father and me. “We could take her to the hospital for further observation if you’d like, but I think her breathing is under control.”

“I’m not worried about her breathing,” I say.

My dad locks eyes with me and a pain crushes my chest as we both nod and look at the paramedic. “She needs to be hospitalized for her depression. We have been trying to take care of her,” he says. “But I think she could use extra help for a while.”

The paramedics look at each other. “No problem, we’ll take her in,” the woman says before standing. “If the hospital deems her in need, they will keep her under observation for a few days, then take it from there.”

“Thank you,” I say, wiping tears from my face. “She needs help.”

Once my mother’s breathing moves to a steady pattern, they shift her onto a gurney in preparation to move her into the back of the ambulance. She opens her eyes, looking between my father and me as they roll her out the front door.

We follow them onto the driveway until they stop in front of the large doors, carefully swinging them open. With dirt caked in her nails, she reaches up and lifts the oxygen mask from her mouth.

“I found it,” she says to Dad, a smile spreading on her face. “I found our baby.”

“You did,” my father says, placing his hand on the blanket she still has clutched in her arms. I watch the exchange in shock, with so many questions and so many tears. “They are going to take you to rest, Della. Do you want me to come?”

“Yes,” she says as the gurney begins to move.

“Okay, I’m right behind you,” he says. We watch as they lift her bed into the back of the vehicle and silently drive away.

Sitting on the porch stairs with my knees to my chest, I watch as my father walks back toward me, an array of emotions moving through me at once. I don’t understand what’s going on. And after spending the last two months hating him, I’m having a hard time figuring out how I should feel seeing him again.

“Jelly bean,” he says, sinking onto the steps next to me. I keep my eyes straight ahead as feelings of both comfort and uncertainty crawl through my flesh at the sound of his voice. “I’m about to go to the hospital but I want to make sure you’re okay first.”

“What’s going on? Who is Daisy?” I ask, finally looking at him.

My dad exhales a shaky breath as he looks away from me, down at his hands. “Daisy was your sister. She died from SIDS when she was four months old.”

I had put two and two together after seeing all the pictures but still, I look at him in disbelief. “Why didn’t you guys tell me?”

“It happened two years before you were born,” he says. “We were wrecked.It was a really hard time and it pushed your mother into a very deep state of depression. She was suicidal. She had to be hospitalized for two months and was on strong medication for over a year.”

“My God,” I say, tears clouding my vision. “That’s so horrible.”

“It was,” he says, meeting my eyes.

“But why did you hide it from me?”

“It was just so bad, Xia.” He rubs a hand on his knee before stretching his legs in front of him. “I wanted to tell you. I wanted to share Daisy with you. But there was never a good time. You have a fantastic mother, the most resilient, amazing woman in the world. Her one and only weakness is her