His Hush-Hush Baby - Holly Rayner Page 0,27
fridge. Taking a deep breath, she opened her mouth, about to say she needed to leave, but he cut her off without realizing it.
“How are your parents?” he asked.
“They’re good.” She rubbed her hands together. That wasn’t entirely true. Yesterday, her mom had woken up and gotten dressed to go to a job she’d left ten years earlier.
But none of that had anything to do with Kai. He couldn’t help, and he couldn’t understand. Mostly because she’d already decided not to let him do either of those things.
He nodded, setting tomatoes and basil on the cutting board. “That’s good.”
She cringed. “Kai, this feels weird.”
“Yeah. It does.” His eyes found hers, their draw so strong it was impossible to look away.
“I should go.”
He sighed. “I can’t stop you, but I don’t want you to go.”
She put one foot on the floor, but the other stayed hanging in the air.
“I’m not going to beg.” He paused. “Unless you want me to. That’s not what you want, right?”
She laughed, but at the same time his question caused so much pain. “No. I don’t want you to beg.”
He nodded slowly, thoughtfully. “I would. I’d do anything for you. I don’t mean only to keep you; I mean I’d do anything to help you out. To make you happy.”
Her breath hitched in her throat. No one had ever said anything like that to her. It made her want to fling herself into his arms and forget all about those emails.
But was he telling the truth?
She swallowed hard. “You don’t have to say that,” she whispered.
“Why not?” His eyes flashed with intensity. “It’s true.”
“That’s what you feel now. Later…if we got to know each other better…” She looked at the ground. What was the point of this?
“Not to be harsh or anything,” he said, “but I really think I can make my mind up for myself. Sure, things change. Feelings change. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t give what’s a really good relationship a fair shot.”
Her face grew hot, and she snapped her eyes up to look at him. “I told you where I’m at, Kai. I’m sorry you can’t respect that.”
His eyes widened, and then realization filled them. Shoulders dropping, he shook his head.
“God. You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m not respecting your boundaries at all. What’s wrong with me?”
“It’s okay,” she mumbled, though she was already gathering her things.
His face was pained. “I would still like you to stay. We don’t have to talk about us at all. I understand if you need to go, though.”
She nodded, her jaw tight. “I need to go. Good night, Kai.”
“Good night, Diane.”
She couldn’t even look at him; it hurt too much. Rushing from the apartment, she opened her rideshare app and splurged on a car back to Brooklyn.
The whole ride home, she ran over their conversation in her head. Kai had been so nice, and he’d seemed to genuinely miss her. It was hard to marry that version of him with the Kai that swindled clients.
Back in Sunset Park, she dumped her bags at her apartment, but she couldn’t sit still. Knowing her parents could probably use her help with something anyway, she walked the few blocks to their place.
“Hello,” she called, letting herself in.
“In the kitchen!” Ruby called.
Diane smiled to herself. Her mom’s answer was a good sign that she was in a strong place tonight. Hanging her purse on the hook by the front door, she followed the smell of her dad’s lasagna to the back of the apartment.
“I was about to text you.” Trevor pulled the lasagna from the oven and set it on the stove. “See if you wanted dinner.”
“Pasta is exactly what I need right now, so yes please.” Diane squeezed her mother’s shoulder. “Hi, Mom.”
Ruby looked up from the adult coloring book she sat at the table drawing in. “Oh. Hi…” Her eyebrows pinched together.
Diane’s heart constricted. Okay, then. Maybe tonight wasn’t such a great one, after all.
“Why do you need pasta?” Diane’s dad pulled a beer from the fridge. “Busy day?”
Diane bit her tongue. He still didn’t know about Kai’s home mural. “Not really. I’m tired, is all. Carbing it up sounds nice.”
“Want a beer? I picked up some of those IPAs from that Jersey brewery you like.”
“No, thanks. I would probably fall asleep if I had anything to drink. Water is good.” She opened a cabinet and got herself a glass.
This whole not-drinking thing was getting hard. She was going to need to think up some more excuses for it.
She filled