was this. This big, looming thing that had created her, transformed her into the person who had moved into Hope Springs Ranch. And what she had been every day since.
“He hit me,” she said. “He said there was nothing wrong with him. It was just all the stupid, stupid women in his life. And we made him do it. I made him do it. Because I made him so angry. And I had to be my mother’s fault. He said he never hit her until me. It was me.” She blinked furiously. “He just said that. Over and over again. And then you came for me. You came for me, Ryder. And you stopped him. And you were the one who sat with me at the hospital. You were the one who got him arrested. You helped me. My own parents hurt me. But you... You rescued me.”
“You never told me any of this,” he said, his voice rough.
“I know. And you never asked because you’re too good to ask. Too good to ask what I had done. I just asked him why he couldn’t love me.”
And she had emerged determined never to feel shame about what she did. About her body. About who she was. She had emerged determined never to be that girl who asked in such a small, frightened voice why her father didn’t love her.
To ask for love and to look up and see only a violent void was a nightmare. The nightmare, perhaps.
The most awful, wrenching thing that she could ever imagine. And she had endured it. She had come out of it. And she had been determined to learn from it. To never feel like that again.
Ever.
And here she was, vulnerable now, but not afraid. Not afraid because of Ryder. Because of everything he was and everything he always would be.
She had landed somewhere safe at least. She could be confident in that. Her child would never have to look at his father and ask that question.
That was a gift. One that she would never, ever undervalue.
“He was broken,” Ryder said. “The reasons you can’t love come from inside you.”
There was something hollow and empty in his voice, and it made her want to ask another question, but she feared the answer far too much. So she didn’t ask. Instead, she kissed his forearm, and rested herself more deeply against him. No good came from asking questions you didn’t want the answers to.
She had done her best to make a life where she didn’t need to ask those kinds of questions. And she didn’t.
She didn’t need to.
She had him. He was committed to her. To taking care of her, to taking care of the baby. There was no reason ever to ask for more. No reason to hope for more. So she wouldn’t. And she would be all the happier for it.
She had his arms. And they would always protect her.
What more could she possibly need?
* * *
THE FAMILY FOURTH of July picnic was interesting this year. West and his half brother, Emmett, made for a fascinating new addition. West was the subject of much interrogation from Colt and Jake, who had come back from the circuit for the event.
But they took a break from interrogating West just long enough to corner Ryder and shove a beer in his hand. “Getting married, huh?” Colt asked.
“To Sammy,” Jake added.
“And having a baby,” Logan added.
“Are you congratulating me or accusing me of something?” Ryder asked.
“Both,” Jake said, looking at Colt, who nodded in agreement. “Definitely both.”
“Seriously?”
“If you hurt her,” Jake said.
“We will tear you apart,” Colt added.
“Limb from limb,” Jake finished, then took a swallow of beer.
“I’m sorry,” Ryder said. “Have I stepped into an alternate dimension? I have been taking care of Sammy for the past seventeen years. I’ll keep doing it now.”
“She doesn’t have a father who will threaten you. She doesn’t have brothers to do it. She has us.”
“I’m your brother, you assholes.”
“Technically our cousin,” Colt said.
“No relation,” Logan said.
“This is the thanks I get?” he asked. “For taking care of you fools for all those years?”
Colt shrugged. “Sammy’s a nice woman.”
“I’m nice,” Ryder said.
Colt shook his head. “You’re a lot of things, but nice isn’t really one of them. Decent. Good. But not nice.”
“Ungrateful fuckhead,” Ryder grumbled.
“See, my point,” he said.
“I’m taking responsibility,” Ryder said. “Doing what any good man would do.”
“Oh, I hope that you used that in your proposal,” Jake said. “Height of romance.”