Here Lies a Saint (Here Lies #2) - C.L. Matthews Page 0,28

even a future. He wanted a specific man, one I'd heard things about over the years.

"Where is he?" The question feels like sandpaper in my throat.

"He's dead, Jordan," he enunciates the word dead as if it's a disgrace and not a sadness. It's like him to brush emotions off as impotence instead of a loss. He didn't lose his son, did he? He lost his money bags, the person to drive his fortune higher and higher, the one who kept him powerful.

Now, all that's left is little ol' me, the misfit with a heart too soft to kill.

"Carrying on," he proceeds without batting another eyelash. "You are to be enrolled into Arcadia. We have been given the mission to reveal which founding children have disobeyed the blood oaths our forefathers gave."

He doesn't stop to see if I'm absorbing information, just takes a sip of brandy and continues on like I'm a socialite or client and not his son who has just been informed his brother is dead.

Gone.

My heart clamps painfully, allowing me nothing but pain. Pain isn't allowed to be felt; it's meant to be given. Nothing I do or say can change it, so, I swallow my sorrow and pretend my heart has somehow hardened in the years I've been gone.

"You're now the Emeralds Vice President," he explains.

I stop him. "How? I'm not of age. I'm not even the domineering bloodline."

"Cassidy Hudson is the current President. He's the leading bloodline. The Kranes are no more." My heart hurts. It physically twinges with pain. The twins are dead? The need to ask questions, demand answers, and sob for those gone is there underneath my rib cage, but these words and desires cannot come to fruition. To survive, I must harden. To find answers, I must seek. To win, I must fight silently.

My mouth feels drier now than when he told about Maxim, but I swallow the questions back just like my fear and nausea, soldiering on. It's all I have.

"You'll be watching after Colton Hudson. She's been initiated into the Student Gov. It's a testament for Cassidy's strength as a leader. He may lead because his blood says so, but he's weak. I can tell." Father shuffles papers, going through them like business contracts, and the sickness welling inside me feels more potent than ever.

Colton Hudson. My heart beats faster at her name.

"You will be hidden. This is your most important place. The shadows are your friends. The darkness is your cover, and the lies you wield are most important. Don't disappoint me, Jordan. I've lost one son to stupidity. Your mother couldn't bear to lose the other."

Keywords being Mother.

He would be fine. A mistress could easily birth another, and he would have another go at it in eighteen years. Father is only forty. He could still produce more children.

One thing is certain. I feel sick. There's not enough marijuana in the world to ease the disgust inside me.

Father sets down the papers, peering over at me. His eyes dissect like he's taking me in for the first time.

"You've grown. Good. Means you'll be able to produce an heir as soon as you graduate."

I do everything in my power not to flare my nostrils, to not show weakness, anger, or the depths of my despair that cloud my every thought.

"Anything you say, sir," I respond finally.

He hands me a folder, his hand brushing mine for a slight moment. "Make me proud, Jordan."

With that, I walk away, up the stairs, and when the door shuts, I hit the shower to cry. Everyone and everything I've ever known has changed.

How can I do this?

Who's left for me to depend on?

Chapter Ten

Present

Colt

Disappointment shouldn't be an emotion I'm used to, but I can tell you exactly how it tastes, looks, and feels like. Its color is dull, mellow, and dissatisfying, but it's so present I know its shade by heart.

Knowing the twins hide things hurts me.

Knowing the rest of the guys are involved makes me sick.

Knowing Mel could also have pretended to be my friend is the absolute worst thing on my mind.

I told Just that I would be at Mel's, but in reality, I'm hiding in my bunker with two joints, smoking my life away. After my first one is gone, I'm feeling lightheaded and airy in a good way. I'm not thinking about the fact that my best friend is dead, my boyfriends are a part of the fray, and the rest are also suspects. Where my mind lives right now is