Jamis immediately denied it. "I'm fully committed to Cali. It's just…"
"You're no longer the most powerful one in this relationship," Taarig finished for him. "Welcome to my universe."
"What?" Jamis gave him a shocked look. Was Taarig saying he wasn't happy with their relationship? It was the first time Jamis had heard it. Jamis had risen through the Coalition faster than Taarig, but that was because Taarig refused any promotion that would separate them. If he hadn't, Taarig would probably be the Commander of his own Star Base. "T?"
"It was my choice, J," Taarig reassured, knowing what Jamis thought because even as angry as he was at his bond mate, he wouldn't let him think he regretted his decision, "But that doesn't mean there aren't times it chafes when I have to follow instead of lead."
"You lead all the time. You're my second."
"That's right. I'm your second. I only lead when you're not around, and I'm okay with that, professionally. Privately I expect to be treated as an equal because we are, and you always have, but now it's not just us. Cali's involved, and she's more powerful than either of us, and that's what got you so upset that you harmed our Lalla."
Jamis didn't like the way that sounded. It made him seem petty and childish, and he wasn't. Was he? He'd known their relationship would change when they made Cali their Lalla. He hadn't considered they'd physically change. And they both had. The proof was in the faintest lines of energy flickering beneath his and Taarig's skin. Suddenly the rest of what Taarig said hit him, and his eyes widened. "I'd never harm our Lalla! I didn't touch her!"
"You harmed her with the way you reacted and your words. She completely opened herself up to us, trusted us, and you rejected her!"
"I didn't!" Jamis denied, then scrubbed frustrated hands over his face as he thought back over the last few minutes, seeing it through Cali's eyes. "Ruk! I didn't mean it that way. I just needed a moment to adjust."
"I know that. Cali doesn't."
"Then let's go explain it to her."
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
Cali tipped her head up and let the water raining down from above hide the evidence of her tears. Gods, her heart had never hurt so bad. She had everything she'd secretly dreamed of for the briefest of moments. More because she had two males who loved and accepted her as she was.
Cali.
A Zagreus.
Then it was ripped away.
Was this the Gods’ way of punishing her for how she'd treated her father? By making her feel what he had?
It made no sense and perfect sense all at the same time. While the situations were completely different, the result was the same. They'd both melded with others without them understanding what it truly meant. Now Cali had to live with the consequences.
"Did you think you could dismiss us like that, little beast?"
Water whipped off Cali as she spun around, stepping out of the flowing water to find Jamis and Taarig entering her cleansing unit. They hadn't left her.
"I know I'm an arrogant, insufferable male," he told her, using the words she said to him back in that survival shelter, "but I am also the male that loves you more than his life span. When you were sucked out of that airlock, my heart and soul sucked out with you. I'll never get them back because they belong to you now."
"Jamis…" she began only to stop when he placed a gentle finger against her lips.
"Let me finish."
Cali couldn't prevent the sides of her mouth from quirking up. Jamis was arrogant and insufferable, even when trying to apologize for being arrogant and insufferable. For some reason, it made her love him even more.
"I'm sorry for the way I reacted and wish I could vow that it would never happen again, but I can't. I am what I am. It will take me some time to adjust to what this bonding means for all of us. But never, ever, take my reactions as a rejection of you or what we have."
"May I speak now?" she asked, and he moved his finger away from her lips but only to caress her cheek. "I want you to know," she looked to Taarig, who had moved to Jamis’s side, "both of you, that I'm sorry I didn't make sure you completely understood what bonding, melding, with me would mean for you."
"We didn't give you much of a chance," Taarig reminded her as he caressed