Heartless (Steel Demons MC #6) - Crystal Ash Page 0,92
arms around me, I was full-on sobbing.
“Mari,” he choked, his breaths ragged and green eyes filled with unspilled tears. “Fuck, baby, I—”
“You saved me,” I rasped, cupping his face. “Thank all the gods you were there.”
“I almost wasn’t.” He pressed his hand over mine, blinking and making a single tear track down his cheek. “If I had been even a minute late, he could’ve—”
“It’s okay.” I wiped his tear away and pulled him forward to kiss his forehead. “I’m okay, and I love you.”
“You shouldn’t be the one comforting me,” he huffed, holding my hands and squeezing them like he’d never let go. “It’s never happening again, sugar. I promise you. I never should have let it happen in the first place, but I’ll spend every last breath I have protecting you. I swear.”
His eyes hardened as he spoke, the ruthless scowl growing deeper on his face. I knew he was trying to make me feel safe, but the knot in my gut just twisted and contorted even tighter.
“What are you saying?” I asked.
Reaper’s hands lowered to my lap. “Shadow is going to answer for what he did to you, of course.”
“But he…” My brain spun, trying to reconcile all the conflicting feelings in my body, my heart, and my gut. Terror still gripped me, my brain flashing images of my last moments of consciousness in an attempt to process the trauma. My heart raced, the panic still running high. And right alongside those images and sensations, I saw the Shadow I knew. The one I loved and trusted just as much as any of my men. I may have felt all kinds of contradictory ways, but I knew one thing for certain—the truth.
“It was an accident, Reaper.”
My husband’s eyes were venomous as he straightened up, all tears gone in the wake of his hard set jaw. “Don’t, Mari. Don’t you dare defend him, not on this.”
“He forgot to take a pill,” I insisted. “I was so scared, more than I’ve been in my life, but he wasn’t in his right mind—”
“Stop. Just stop.” Reaper raised a hand, squeezing his eyes shut. “Are you listening to yourself?” he demanded, his pulse throbbing in his neck as he fought to keep his voice at a normal level. “He almost ki—fuck, I can’t even say it, Mari.”
“But he didn’t,” I argued. “Because you were there. This was what Daren was telling you about.”
Rhonda pushed in before he could argue, which was excellent timing on her part. My husband’s shoulders shook with rage and I knew this battle wasn’t over.
“Alright, up and at ‘em,” the nurse held the door open. “Mari needs to rest.”
Steeling himself with a deep breath, Reaper leaned in and planted a fast kiss on my lips. “I’ll be back tomorrow. I love you.”
“Love you…” My voice had already faded away, weariness sinking into my limbs.
I felt like a different person before even opening my eyes the next morning. Everything still hurt, but with more of a dull ache than the stabbing, blinding pain of the night before. Cracking my eyes open was easier, and it didn’t even hurt to smile at the black cat lounging on my hospital bed.
“Hey, Freyja.” My voice felt stronger too as I held my fingers out to her. She butted my hand with a loud purr, coming closer to rest in my lap. “I was about to thank the gods for strong drugs,” I whispered, petting down her back. “But it’s you healing me, isn’t it? Healing us all.”
I didn’t get an answer besides an intense stare from those sharp green eyes. In the wake of what happened, I was hoping she’d have more to say. This cat had loved on Shadow since she first appeared to me. My connection to him had been guided by this goddess’ presence, and now that connection was wounded, if not severed completely.
“Did you know this would happen?” I asked, stroking lightly over the cat’s head. “Did you know he would…” My fingers began to shake, heart speeding up too fast in my chest. Accelerated physical healing apparently did nothing for my emotional state. At least I didn’t have any nightmares yet. That, I could thank the drugs for.
His mind is still deeply wounded and has not healed. The warm, omniscient voice rolled over me moments later. Regressions are to be expected with someone as fragile as him. Freyja looked directly at me. I would not have taken you, daughter. You still have much to do.