Headlines (Prime Time #3) - Ella Frank Page 0,31
tonight—or any decisions, for that matter.
I made my way up the drive and tried the front door, fully expecting the chain, but when it opened with no issue, I stepped inside. All of the lights had been turned off, but as I made my way past the living room, I noted the bottle of bourbon and two glasses exactly where we’d left them.
The house was silent as I continued toward my bedroom, and somewhere in the back of my mind I was sure I’d find Xander with his bags packed, ready to leave. Instead, I found the bedroom lights off, the curtains drawn, and Xander curled up under the covers. The sheer relief that flooded me was overwhelming.
I removed my clothes and climbed beneath the sheets, and as I lay there staring at the ceiling, I couldn’t help but wonder what he would do if I reached out and touched him.
As it turned out, I didn’t have to wonder for long.
“Are you ready to talk now?” Xander switched on the bedside lamp and stared down at me, and his no-nonsense expression coupled with his usually perfect hair sticking up all over the place made me smile.
“I, uh, think so?”
Xander shoved me in the arm—hard. “You think so?” Then he tossed the covers back and got to his feet. “Well, you know what? I know so.”
His hands were on his hips now, and while I knew he was dead serious and this was no time to get distracted, I was finding it difficult to keep my eyes off the tiny scrap of material covering…not that much.
“You don’t argue with someone, tell them you should break up, and then walk out the damn door, Sean.”
Sensing that now probably wasn’t the right time to tell him how spectacular he looked all pissed off, I kept those thoughts to myself and dragged my eyes up to his face.
“I know, I handled that—”
“Horribly?”
Yeah, that sounded about right. “I just… I didn’t know what to do, okay? I still don’t.”
“So your solution is to just end things with me? Is that what you really want?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yes, it fucking matters.”
My eyes widened. I couldn’t remember ever seeing him so worked up, so irate.
“You matter, Sean. When are you going to realize that?”
Xander’s words lingered in the air as I slowly pushed back the covers and shifted to his side of the bed. When my feet touched the ground, I took his hand and tugged him between my legs.
His jaw was bunched and his lips were drawn into a thin, tight line. He looked frustrated, irritated, and one hundred percent ready to argue with me, and never in all my life had I seen someone so damn appealing.
“I don’t want to end things.”
Xander looked off over my shoulder, and I shook his hand to get his attention.
“I mean it.”
He bit down into his lower lip, the frustration turning to hurt as his eyes roamed over my face. “Then why did you say it?”
“Because I’m an idiot?”
Xander shook his head. “Try again.”
I thought back to the sadness in Bailey’s eyes, and now the worry in Xander’s, and sighed. “Because I hate seeing the people I love hurting.”
“Then why would you think leaving me was the right thing to do?”
“Because you were his first.” The words were out of my mouth before I could even think them through.
Xander blinked, and his confusion was obvious. “So what does that mean? That I never get to fall in love again?”
“No,” I said, and then finally voiced the one thing that had been swirling around my head all afternoon: “You do. Just maybe not with me.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“Is it?”
“Yes.” Xander cradled my cheeks and tipped my face up in his direction. “I can’t pick and choose who I fall in love with. No more than you can.”
“But Bailey—”
“Is my friend. He’s someone I love dearly and respect. But he doesn’t get to dictate my personal life, Sean, and he shouldn’t be dictating yours, either.”
I let out a deep breath and shut my eyes, resting my forehead on Xander’s stomach. “I hate this.”
“Me too.”
I took his hips in my hands and rubbed my cheek up against his warm skin. “But I don’t want to lose you.”
Xander trailed his fingers down to my chin. “Then stop pushing me away.”
“You’re right, I know that. It’s just—” I bit off my words, not sure how to express what I was feeling.
“It’s just what?”
Xander’s eyes implored me to open up, to lay it all out there and be