Haunted - Sunny Wolfe Page 0,5
again....”
The words hung in the air for a couple of minutes.
“But, you two weren’t hurt,” Roman whispered.
I shrugged. “Sometimes we want to run free but we can’t.”
“Beth…?”
“Why are you still here at the hospital? Did they check you over?” I changed the subject. Nothing was really wrong with Roman, but I was sure the doctors had already looked him over.
“Yeah, they just did an exam on me. Apparently, the food Andrew left me kept me alive.” He gave a tight smile.
“I’m glad you don’t have to stay in here any longer than that.” I showed him my arm with the tubes running in and out.
“Why does this feel so awkward?” he asked.
“Probably because of the big blue elephant in the room.” I pointed to my electric blue hair.
He paused but finally asked, “How are you?”
Really…? How could he ask me that?
“Well, let me see…I am dehydrated because Jason never fed me.”
“What?” He sounded furious.
“He would give me water here and there, but he needed me thinner to fit into those…dresses.” I paused. “They did a rape kit on me and then the nurses helped me wash up. Too bad they couldn’t get the blue out of my hair before my kid asked, ‘What happened to your hair Mommy?’” I rolled my eyes.
“Beth…”
“And the best part about the whole fucking nightmare was that creepy ass Jason was a virgin so the odds of me having HIV are small…” I laughed hysterically. I couldn’t cry anymore. Not right now. I was all cried out, and the pain medicine they were giving me helped me feel indifferent.
“I am so sorry for what happened to you. Every day I sat in that cell alone praying that you were still alive.”
I looked back at the rain. I wanted to be left to my pain.
“You should have prayed for my death.”
He gasped. “So you did try to kill yourself on purpose?” He waited.
I didn’t know the answer. I barely remembered doing it. I didn’t mean to do it, but on some level, I thought I did want to die.
“When do you go back on tour?” I had to change the subject again.
“I have to leave tomorrow. First concert is in two days. Berg came by to see how I was. He wanted to meet you, but I told him another time. Anyway, according to our contract now that I am back in commission, we have to finish out the tour. We aren’t liable for the concerts that I missed, which is good. It’s some kind of insurance the record label has with the venues, in cases of death or sickness. We only have ten more shows that we have to do, and then I will come back here.”
“Why?” I turned to face him.
“Why what?”
“Why are you coming back here? You live in Los Angeles.” I knew I sounded like a bitch, but I couldn’t control it. I wanted a fight. I was angry! I was livid! If it wasn’t Roman, it could easily have been the wall. But I wanted to fight with someone because when it came down to it, I wasn’t allowed to fight Jason.
“Beth, I would come back here because you live in Tennessee. That’s why.” He sounded confused, hurt even.
“Don’t come back,” I told him in a hateful voice and then looked back toward the window.
“What? You can’t possibly mean that. We love each other.” He sounded scared.
“Roman…love has nothing to do with it.”
“Love has everything to do with it!”
“Don’t you get it? I’m broken.” I turned and looked at him.
“No, you’re not.”
“How do you know? You’ve been with me for what, five minutes and you know how I fucking feel? Listen carefully! Jason. Broke. Me!”
“Beth, you are stronger than this. You aren’t a fucking doll that gets broken.”
“Am I stronger than this?” I knew I was being a bitch.
“Beth, right now, I know it’s hard, but don’t throw us away.”
“Don’t you fucking get it? I am broken. Doll or not. The things he did to me…” I looked away.
Roman’s eyes were watering up.
“You and I can survive this. As long as we are together, we can survive this.” He was pleading. “Don’t shut me out. I know I am new at this relationship thing, but I will learn.”
I looked at him directly.
“Roman…he raped me over and over! He told me if I screamed, he would kill you. He starved me. He broke my ribs. He told me every time he entered me that if I didn’t pretend to like it, he