art, music, theater—and yes, the circus. Nobody would ever dream of going up to someone in medical school and telling them, “Gee, I really think you should have a backup plan. You know, just in case this doesn’t work out for you.”
I realize the end payoff of becoming a doctor might be more financially viable than an aerialist, but money isn’t everything. Not to me, at least. Besides, formulating a backup plan takes time, energy, and money—all of which could be used on the original plan.
I think telling someone to have a backup plan is just an attempt at shaming someone for their life choices while also trying to appear well-meaning.
I don’t want a backup plan.
I want this.
When our food arrives, the musician trades places with someone else. It takes me a moment to recognize him—maybe because I’ve spent so long looking for his face in the crowd that seeing it here doesn’t make sense—but when I see his thick hair pushed to the side and the dip of his eyebrows as he rolls up his shirtsleeves, I feel my heart pound.
Vivien cups her hands around her mouth and lets out a cheer. When the others turn, they all clap and call his name.
And even though it’s impossible that Vas doesn’t hear them, his face doesn’t change even a little bit. He sits down at the piano, brings his fingers to the keys, and starts to play the opening to “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road.” Except Vas doesn’t play it the way it’s written—there’s a haunted quality to it, like he’s rewritten it in his own style.
It’s the same way he plays the violin.
When his voice croons through the microphone, every inch of me comes to life.
I can’t take my eyes off him.
I almost forget where I am completely, until Dexi bumps her shoulder against mine and motions to the bread basket, implying she wants to know if I want the last piece.
I shake my head quickly. “You can have it,” I say breathily.
She makes a face and a small grin builds in the corner of her dimpled cheek, but she doesn’t say a word.
Vas plays cover after cover, all of them so beautifully morphed with his own personality. Mysterious, atmospheric, and full of longing.
It’s hard to remember to eat, but I try anyway.
Jin offers to buy everyone a round of drinks, and when he does, I realize half our table is now dotted around the bar socializing with strangers. Even Maggie is up there, cradling a glass of water in her hand and chatting with Sasha.
When the song ends, Vas seems to look out at the audience for the first time. His gaze is aimless, like fingers brushing over grass. But then our eyes meet, and his entire body stiffens.
Heat rises through me, building in my chest and shooting out in every direction.
I tell myself to look away—order myself to stop staring—but I can’t. I’m transfixed.
And despite everything that’s happened in the last few weeks, I see his green eyes soften.
I’m afraid to wonder what it means.
The next notes make everything in the room disappear except Vas and the piano. I’m no longer in a restaurant—I’m somewhere in a distant galaxy, floating to the sound of his soul.
A dark, raspy version of “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.”
And when he hits the high notes of the melody—when his voice fills the room like the aurora borealis in the night sky—I burst into stardust.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
Vas spends the entire night with Maggie and Sasha at the bar.
He doesn’t know what his voice did to me, and good, because I never want him to find out.
But staying near Maggie—that part feels intentional. Because wherever Maggie is, I know I’m not supposed to be.
After an hour of watching them deep in conversation, boxed in by Jin and Galip flirting hard with a couple strangers, I feel silly for even imagining he might’ve been singing to me.
At some point the venue seems to transform from restaurant into nightclub, and the line at the bar becomes a full-blown crowd. Galip’s new friendship has already fizzled out, but Jin has his arm wrapped around a woman with ridiculously long legs and perfect makeup. Dexi’s been bored for at least the last hour, and eventually everyone is rounded up together and in agreement to head back to the campsite.
Outside, everyone starts to pile back into the cars until I’m all that’s left on the sidewalk, staring awkwardly as Jin, in his half-drunken stupor, realizes his date has taken