Hard Knox - Riley Hart Page 0,43

tentative at first, but then his hand was in my hair and he was pulling me closer, kissing me deeper.

Our tongues moved together, dipped and retreated, danced. Knox pushed off his stool and stood between my legs. My hands went to his hips, my head tilted back as he kissed me like I’d never been kissed before. Like I was his favorite thing in the world and he was savoring me.

He growled into my mouth, all deep and raspy. My brain shut off, and I went on instinct, my legs wrapping around him, my hand journeying from his waist to the bulge beneath his jeans, and oh, fuck yes, he was big. But then his body went tense and he jerked away from me as if I’d electrocuted him.

“Shit. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have touched you like that. I got ahead of myself.” Fuck, why had I pushed? I was pretty sure he’d just had his first kiss from a man, and I’d rushed him. “I’m sorry,” I said again.

“It’s not your fault.” He shook his head, took another step back. “I’m… I’ve never done this before. I’ve never kissed a man or thought about it and…”

“And I pushed. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t do that. Don’t blame yourself. I liked it; clearly, I liked it.” He signaled toward the very obvious erection in his jeans. “I…I don’t know. It’s a lot.” Knox stepped back more, then began to pace. He rubbed his beard before dropping his head back. “Fuck. You’re my friend. I don’t want to lose that. And Logan…he loves you, and this…I don’t know how to process it, or what it means, or what it would do to him, because I don’t know if…”

If he would want more than a release? Than a kiss? If he would want a relationship with me and what how he felt about it either way would do to his son? The part about Logan, how much his kids meant to him, was one of the things I liked so much about Knox. “It won’t happen again.” I stood, and Knox’s eyes zeroed in on my bulge. I turned away.

“I don’t want to screw this up.” And then because he was Knox, he came over to me, put his hands on my shoulders. “I don’t want to hurt you…or Logan…but I don’t know. My brain is a bit of a mess right now.”

“I’m fine,” I lied, stepping away from him. “You won’t hurt me, and we won’t hurt Logan. We just go back to how things were and pretend it didn’t happen.” The words were bitter on my tongue. This hurt infinitely worse than being stood up tonight.

“Cal…” he said, and my heart jumped. It was the first time he called me that, the name I usually hated, but I liked the way it sounded coming from his lips—comfortable, familiar.

“It’s fine, Knox. I get it. Logan comes first. Fucking around with me would make things awkward. Not to mention what’s going on inside you personally.” I didn’t even know if he wanted to fuck around with me. “I need to go.”

“Callum,” he said again.

“It’s fine. I’m just…I’m just gonna go.” I turned and walked out.

Knox didn’t come after me.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Knox

It had been almost a week since I’d seen Callum, and I couldn’t stop thinking about him, about the way he’d tasted, and melted against me, and hearing the noises he’d made when I’d kissed him.

When I’d. Kissed. Him.

I was still trying to wrap my brain around that.

My closest group of friends were all gay or bi men, except Griff, so it wasn’t that. I couldn’t stop thinking…shouldn’t I have known? Had I somehow been lying to myself my whole life? In denial? How could I not have known, and what did all this say about me? What did my attraction to Callum mean for me, because there was one thing I couldn’t deny: I’d liked kissing him.

And I wanted to do it again.

When I told him being here felt right, then mentioned Havenwood, I hadn’t meant the town; I meant being with him.

But then all the other stuff created this storm inside my head again: Never being with a guy before. What did I want from Callum? From us? What would it mean for Logan? Or for Charlotte when she came? And if we did keep this going and we crashed and burned, how much would that break my son’s heart?

I didn’t know what to make of any of it. Things were already different. Callum