I was supposed to come here, have a blast, and hang with Tyler with no feelings involved. That was my plan but of course it’s backfired and now he wants to spend more time with me. I guess I can’t deny it. I want to spend another day with him, too—just to get rid of the burden I’ve been carrying. He really seems like he doesn’t want more. Just a casual fling and I can accept that. I can’t afford the “more” option right now.
Cranking the car, I put it in drive and roll away from the lake house but in my mind, I’m eagerly awaiting for class on Monday and even for our “study session” on Tuesday.
My phone buzzes in the cup holder and I grab it as I approach a red light. At the sight of Nolan’s name, I swallow heavily.
Nolan: We need to talk now, Natalie. Stop ignoring me.
I scowl at the screen. How in the hell am I supposed to stop ignoring someone that’s been seeing someone else behind my back—an ex at that. If I do respond to him I’ll explode but I don’t want that for him. I don’t want him to think I feel anything because I don’t want to. I hate that I still care but I have to let it go. I don’t want to put myself through the pain again because I deserve happiness. I deserve to smile for once in my damn life.
Instead of responding, I turn my phone off and breathe through my nostrils to relax myself. The light flashes green and I hurry to the condo before I end up turning the phone back on and doing something I know I’ll regret in the future.
I can’t take him back. I can’t give into him. I have to realize it’s who he is and it’s who he always will be. If he wants the change, he has to make it himself. I can no longer help with that.
Chapter Sixteen
Nolan
“If she doesn’t answer I’m gonna flip shit,” I grumble as I slouch down on the couch beside Mills.
He chuckles, bringing the rim of his beer bottle to his lips and chugging down a few gulps. His feet are kicked up on the box in front of him and he has various colors of paint all over his arms, his grey T-shirt, and even his faded painter jeans. We had to repaint the living room and Mom’s room today. We also had to take all of the boxes to storage. Doing both of those took up our entire day. It’s around three in the morning and Natalie still hasn’t text me back. We leave tomorrow so if she doesn’t continue to answer I’ll just show up at her condo without a heads up. I really don’t give a fuck. I need to talk to her.
“Tike really put you in the shithole,” Mills says.
“Deeply,” I mutter. I finally turn the screen of my phone off and place it on top of one of the boxes. “She shouldn’t have thought anything negative, though. Her insecurities always take over her. I hate that.”
“The brain of a girl.” He reaches forward to place his empty beer bottle on the floor and then stands. He stretches while gazing around the empty house. It’s bone-dry in here. Not even our beds are in the rooms. There’s nothing but walls and carpets now. It ripped us in half to have to put everything out but I know it’s going to be worth it. Mills went to the bank and sold the house which is good because we need the money. We just aren’t sure when we’re going to get it. As bad as I don’t want to leave just yet, I have to. I have to save my relationship and I have to do it right. I can’t take the misery I feel without Natalie.
“What if she’s met someone else over there already?” Mills takes out a pillow from the box in front of him and places it on the floor. He then grabs one of the sheets and spreads it out. “I mean, what if she doesn’t want a relationship anymore. She’s still young and she feels like she’s been stabbed in the heart . . . twice. I know you didn’t do anything but she doesn’t know that yet and girls think fast. They move fast. They’re some sneaky creatures.”