to have the conversation, he would have to be the one to start it. At least out here, away from Mom, I didn’t have the driving urge to shove him out the door. I could keep it cool.
“Your mom said you’re dating Frankie.”
That was what he wanted to talk to me about? I raised my brows. “Does it matter?”
“Yes and no,” Dad said, not remotely clearing it up. “Just—she said you haven’t been serious about anyone, and you’ve known Frankie for years.”
Mom might have said that, but I doubted they’d had some kind of heart to heart about me. “Dad, what do you want?”
Raking a hand through his sandy blond, yet sporting more than his own fair share of gray, hair, Dad leaned back against his car. “We’ve never really talked about…girls and stuff.”
“Sex?” I didn’t scoff. I didn’t snort. I didn’t do much other than keep it bland. “I’m familiar with sex. Safe sex. Also with STDs and pregnancy. I know about condoms. I also know how to treat a girl right and not fuck around on her. Anything else you want to cover?”
He stared at me a beat. “I always wondered if you knew.”
“We’re not having that conversation.” Some things, I wished I didn’t know.
“Coop, are you ever going to not be pissed at me?”
“Ask me in ten years.”
“Look,” Dad said, studying me with the same eyes I had. Sometimes, I wondered if it had to bug Mom how much I looked like him. “I screwed up. I accept that I made mistakes. I owe your mother, more than I’ll ever be able to repay her. I want to make it up to her, but she wants nothing to do with that.”
He wasn’t telling me anything I didn’t know.
“But, Coop, I want to know you, too.”
“Actions speak louder than words, Dad,” I told him, unwilling to change my tune at this point. “You hurt Mom. Then you left.”
“She told me to get out.” He let out an exasperated sigh. “Can you understand that I want to fight for her, but I can’t fight her and hurt her again?”
“Why did you hurt her in the first place?” As much as I didn’t want to have this conversation. I had to know. “Why do that to her? You guys always seemed…happy, she always had your back. Hell, she had your back even after this crap. She’s never blamed you. She’s never talked down about you. She’s encouraged me to give you a chance.”
“Because your mother is a much better person than I am.”
“Well, on that, we can agree.” It was my turn to rake a hand through my hair, and the moment it hit me that I was mirroring his gesture, I dropped my hands to my side again.
“I was a fool,” Dad told me. “That’s what happened. I let some soft words and compliments go to my head. I let myself think I deserved more than I did. Your mother worked. I worked. We were always busy, and she never seemed to have time for me anymore. There was always something with you and Trina.” He shook his head. “Look, I was a fool. I can’t change the past, I can only try to do better in the future. Maybe—maybe if you give me a chance, maybe your mom will too.”
I didn’t tell him I wouldn’t hold my breath, but at the same time… “Dad, I’m eighteen. I graduate this year. I’m going to college. This isn’t like six or seven years ago. Focus on Trina, she needs parents.” I didn’t need him. Mom was doing just fine where I was concerned.
“Then how about a friend?” Dad offered. “Maybe we can start small. I’d offer to take you and Frankie to a game, but the series already wrapped for the year. Maybe in the spring. You know, if you two are still together…”
If? Frankie and I were connected, period. But I let that go because I didn’t want to have that conversation. “Maybe. Look, I gotta go.” I backed up a couple of steps and then hesitated, because Dad hadn’t moved. “I’m not promising anything, but text me and maybe we can…grab a burger or something.”
“I’d like that.” Dad straightened, the relief coursing through him almost palpable. Yeah, I could do a burger. I’d make it up to Mom. “Bring Frankie, if you want a buffer. I haven’t seen her in a while, and it’d be good to get to know her again.” He hesitated. “Unless you think Maddy