be so close, but now it feels as if you don’t want to be here.’
‘I’ve found it hard,’ says Kate honestly. ‘Being here without Dad is . . .’
A tear falls onto her cheek and Rose goes to her, pulling her in. ‘I know, I know,’ she soothes. ‘But he wouldn’t want to see us all like this, would he?’
Kate imagines Jess turning up when Harry was still alive and shudders. What would he have made of it? How would he have reacted to being told that she and Lauren had another sister? Kate shocks herself by thinking that she’s glad that he’s not here to witness it.
‘Talk to Lauren,’ pleads Rose. ‘For the sake of the family.’
‘If you really want to protect our family, then you’re going to have to tell us the truth,’ says Kate, letting her mother’s hands fall from her own. ‘Because you’re the only one who can.’
19
Lauren
Lauren is on cloud nine when she wakes up and realizes that the plethora of dreams she’d had were just a realistic extension of the evening she’d had. She smiles, desperate to stay in her happy cocoon for just a little bit longer, but there’s hot breath on her face and she sleepily opens one eye, expecting to see Noah lying beside her. She gasps out loud when she’s faced with Simon, his head just inches from her, his eyes wide and staring.
‘Who were you expecting to see?’ he asks.
‘Wh-what?’ she stutters, clawing to get up.
‘Who were you expecting to see?’
‘Noah,’ she says. ‘Who else?’
‘You were talking in your sleep.’
‘Was I?’ she says, her body immediately taut with tension. She daren’t ask what she was saying, but not knowing is almost as nerve-wracking.
‘You sounded like you were having a good time,’ says Simon. There’s a cold edge to his voice that she doesn’t like.
Lauren reaches for her dressing gown at the end of the bed.
‘Who were you with?’ he asks.
Pinpricks of sweat rush to her pores as she struggles to remember what she told him, or even where she told her mother she was going. Words, names and places fly about in her head as her brain goes into overdrive, hoping that something is going to start making sense. She pictures Kate and feels instantly calmer.
‘I told you,’ she says, as if affronted. ‘I went out with Kate.’
Simon pulls himself up onto the headboard. ‘Why would you think I was talking about last night?’
‘What?’ She’s tired of playing these stupid mind games.
‘I was asking who you were with in your dream,’ he says. ‘Because you seemed to be having such a good time.’
‘For God’s sake,’ she says, getting up and tying her gown in a double knot around her waist.
He looks at her through narrowed eyes. ‘But now you’ve made me wonder about last night.’
She’s sure her heart skips a beat as she looks at him, forcing herself to hold his gaze. ‘I’m going to start breakfast.’
As she walks down the stairs, a notification on her phone lights up her dressing gown pocket, and as she scrambles to pull it out, she’s hit by the sudden realization that she’s not cut out to be an unfaithful wife.
It was so good to see you – I can’t wait until we do it again, reads the text from ‘Sheila’.
Heat rushes to her ears as she remembers Justin’s hand on the back of her neck, pulling her towards him as they stood outside the pub.
‘I can’t,’ she’d said, turning her head just as his lips were about to touch hers.
‘I’m sorry, I don’t . . . I . . . I shouldn’t have.’
Lauren had caught hold of his wrist as he’d taken his hand away from her neck. ‘It’s okay,’ she’d whispered, desperate to hold on to that tingling sensation, as his skin touched hers, for just that little bit longer. He’d cupped her cheek and it had taken all her willpower not to kiss his palm as he traced the outline of her jaw, his fingers outlining her lips.
‘What are we going to do?’ she’d said, looking into his pale blue eyes, knowing that if she weren’t a married mother of three, going home with him would be a foregone conclusion.
‘Whatever you want to do,’ he’d said, and she felt herself falling in love with him all over again.
‘It’s complicated,’ she said.
‘I know, but if we just take things slow . . .’
‘I need to go,’ she said, before she did anything she might regret.