Grown Ups - Marian Keyes Page 0,117

blitzing smoothies. Johnny and TJ manned the coffee machine while Bridey was busybodying about and Ferdia decanting what looked like home-baked granola into a heavy ceramic bowl. The only person missing was Liam.

‘Look at you, my little hunter-gatherers!’ Jessie exclaimed, when she saw them. ‘You’re like an ad for wholesome living. Photo. Where’s my phone?’

Examining the contents of the trugs, she lavished praise on Vinnie and Tom. ‘You got great stuff. Look at these peaches.’ To the room she called, ‘I could do fried peaches, with honey. Have we honey? Course we’ve honey! And pistachios?’

‘Bougie!’ Bridey yelled.

‘I’m with Bridey,’ Johnny said. ‘Settle the head.’

‘I just want Nutella,’ Vinnie said. ‘I could easily eat that giant jar and not even feel sick.’

Nervous laughter rose and suddenly no one was looking Cara’s way. They must be thinking Vinnie had inherited whatever was wrong with her – the overeating part anyway. It was mortifying.

But early days, she reminded herself. Early days.

‘So, what can I cook for people?’ Jessie asked. ‘Cara?’

Immediately everyone cocked an ear.

‘Two-egg omelette, please,’ she answered politely. ‘With tomato.’

‘Cheese?’

‘No, thanks.’

Jessie was about to start twisting her arm – as a feeder, it was her automatic reflex. Then she remembered. ‘Coming up.’

The daily food plan, drawn up by the hospital’s dietician, was meant to stop the dips and spikes in Cara’s blood-sugar levels that apparently led to binges. Maybe it was working, because she’d had no cravings for sweets or chocolates for the last few weeks. Which was the maddest thing ever because in those months before Gulban Manor it had been literally her every thought: what chocolate she’d buy, when she’d buy it, when she’d eat it. Now she seemed to have freedom.

But who knew that freedom could feel so … flat?

SIXTY-EIGHT

Robyn was a mean girl, Jessie observed. Saoirse’s gratitude towards her for being her friend was painful to witness. It reminded Jessie of her own teenage years, a time she never wanted to remember.

Robyn was also lazy. She’d scarpered when the breakfast clear-up needed to be done, then appeared poolside in a bikini, where the bottoms were pulled right up her bum.

‘What’s that about?’ Jessie asked Johnny, as they stood by the window, washing the pans. ‘Why didn’t she just buy a thong?’

‘It’s the look, I think. They were doing it on Love Island.’

‘But what if they all fancy her?’

‘So what?’

‘But what if they all, you know, get turned on?’

‘So what?’

‘But what if they get erections?’

‘Who?’

‘Well … you.’

‘Don’t. That’s horrible.’

Doubtfully, she looked at him. ‘I think all men are dirty yokes, raring to go, day or night.’

‘I won’t get an erection.’ He looked towards the pool where Ed was in a splashing war with all the younger kids. ‘And neither will Ed.’

‘Liam?’

‘Time will tell, if he ever appears.’

‘Ferdia?’

‘Ah, yeah, course. He’s that age. Where is he anyway?’

‘Knocking something down with Seppe and Lorenzo. A wall, I think.’

‘That’s all very wholesome.’

‘Look at the bunnies,’ Jessie said indulgently. ‘Little Dilly.’ She was the cutest thing, small and sturdy in her mermaid swimsuit with the ruffles on the bum. And Bridey, ever the catastrophist, in a yellow floatsuit.

‘What’s the deal with Bridey and the flotation tubes?’ Johnny asked. ‘She can swim.’

‘She says you can never be too careful.’

Robyn stood up to rearrange her bikini.

‘Why’s your woman’s bum bothering you?’ Johnny asked.

‘I just want everything to be nice. Because I’m nouvy, Nell says.’ She added, ‘I really love Nell.’

As if Jessie had summoned her, Nell popped up into their line of vision wearing a white bikini.

‘God!’ With a soapy hand, Jessie clutched Johnny’s bare arm. ‘Look at Nell.’

‘Now I’ve an erection. Though it seems like you’re the one with a boner for Nell.’

‘Johnny, don’t say “boner”.’

He was squinting at Nell. ‘What’s different about her?’

‘The hair. Not pink any more. Look at it there, a blonde cascade, tumbling down her back. Oh, here we go …’

Robyn – maybe threatened by Nell’s clean-cut sexiness – stood up again and tucked her bikini bottoms even more tightly between her bum cheeks.

‘There’s no more room up there! And where does she think she is?’ Jessie demanded. ‘Nikki Beach? This is a family holiday and there will be no erections! I’m going to patrol the side of the pool with a metal pipe. I’ll be the erection police. Any evidence of twitchy mickey, I’ll hit it a whack with my pipe.’

Johnny laughed. ‘“Twitchy mickey”. You’re the very best.’

‘Oh, yeah?’

His smile faded. ‘Oh. Yeah.’ He slid his arms around her waist and pulled her hard against him.

‘Woah. What’s with the

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