the air. There’s really no dilly-dallying with him around — you just go straight in the water, whether you want to or not. The water is freezing, but it feels great. For a few seconds, I can almost forget.
We have a feast for dinner. Greg’s a good cook. Gwen has sure scored with this guy. Greg is a good man and she’s very lucky to have him. When I first met the two of them, I was surprised. I expected a gorgeous trophy-husband — the tall, dark and handsome type. And Greg’s not quite that. But I also thought they were the cutest couple on the planet. They’re very close — always hugging and giving each other pecks on the cheek. There doesn’t seem to be much drama between them like there is between Gabe and I. Gwen never has any stories, never shows up at work heartbroken over a silly fight, never has juicy ‘kiss and make up’ stories. No, those are more my thing. I’m not sure if their marriage is as passionate as ours — because she never talks about the sex, which is odd, because Gwen talks about everything, especially sex. A beautiful, sophisticated woman like Gwen could probably have any man she wanted, and she chose wisely indeed. Sometimes, having a gorgeous husband only leads to trouble. And I’m most definitely the perfect example of that. If Bridget hadn’t liked the looks of Gabe so much, we wouldn’t find ourselves in the situation we’re in today.
I take a seat on one of the white linen covered chairs at the rustic round table. “Be super careful, girls,” I warn Chloe and Claire. “I don’t want a drop on these nice white chairs.” It seems like an odd choice for dining table chairs, but it does add to the whole look — the heavenly light and airy rustic beach house vibe. Gwen and Greg set the platters of grilled chicken skewers, corn on the cob, strawberry salad, and grilled peppers on the table.
“Wow. Thank you so much guys,” I tell them. “I feel like I’m at a five-star resort.”
Gwen laughs. “Just wait ‘til you see the bill.”
Gabe smiles as he helps himself to an enormous amount of food.
“I hope you’ve made a lot,” I tell Greg. “Gabe can pack it in.”
Greg helps himself to some salad. “Oh, there’s plenty,” he says with a wide smile.
Gabe shoots me a quick wink.
And I’m completely taken aback when my stomach does a tiny flip.
The guys are still playing cards. My lids are heavy as Gwen tells me, yet again, about her mother-in-law — she has a lot of stories. Whenever I hear her horror stories, I’m glad my own in-laws are relatively normal, nice people. We don’t see them too often, but when we do, everything’s cool.
But I know they’re about to hate me. When the truth comes out, everyone will know I’ve been with another man. They’ll know what a tramp I’ve become, that I’ve turned into my mother, controlled by lust. They’ll know I’ve turned my back on my husband and my girls. They’ll hate me. Everyone will hate me. And I deserve to be hated.
It’s still bright out, the sunset beautiful. But I just can’t seem to stay awake.
Gwen stops mid-sentence, and tells me I look exhausted.
“I’m sorry,” I apologize. “I’ve been really tired lately.”
“No problem, sweetie.” She eyes me with a curious look. It’s only about nine o’clock.
“I should probably get the girls and myself to bed.”
She sets her fruity drink down on the coffee table. “Sure. We’ll chat tomorrow.”
“Sounds good.”
I tuck the girls into the two wrought iron vintage twin beds. They look so cozy, wrapped up in the old whimsical blue and yellow quilts. Claire hugs Bitzy, who is tucked in comfortably under the crook of her arm.
“Good night, sweetie. Love you,” I whisper as I kiss her forehead.
“Good night,” she says, “love you.”
And then I lean in to my left, and repeat the whole ritual with Chloe. It’s like Groundhog Day.
Gabe comes in quickly to kiss them goodnight. He kisses me too as he leaves the playful room — a sweet peck on the forehead.
As I turn off the light before I step out, my throat grows thick and a tear streams down my cheek.
God, what have I done?
I’m exhausted, yet surprisingly, I lay here on the striped sheets, awake…edgy. I don’t think about Weston tonight. I can’t stop thinking about Gabe. I want him to join me in this delicious bed. I