Griff's Place (Havenwood #4) - Riley Hart Page 0,2

better, but it didn’t. Still, I didn’t have to pretend there because I wasn’t close enough to anyone for them to notice.

Then my parents died, and I went back to Havenwood to take care of Kellan. At that point, wanting to fuck or not didn’t matter. I had more important things to worry about, like how to raise a kid, and pay bills, and protect Kell. Focusing on him made it easier to shove my own shit into the closet. I devoted my life to him and Chase. Chase eventually left, and then it was just me, Kell, and a while after, my bar, Griff’s.

Then Chase came back and fell in love with my brother, and…I didn’t need to take care of Kell anymore. I hadn’t needed to take care of Kell in a long time. He was a grown-ass man, but again, I’d lied to myself that he needed me.

That left me Griff’s and, well, those three terms Kellan had given me when I admitted I didn’t feel the same sexual desire most people did: aromantic, asexual, and demisexual. I did a shit ton of research on them, then thought, who the fuck cared if I walked around with the desire to get my dick sucked by attractive people? I had my bar. My brother. My friends. Josh and I had this weird relationship where we hung out sometimes even though we annoyed the fuck out of each other.

After that, Remington came to town, and he and Law fell in love. They’d always been in love apparently, but they’d finally found their way back to each other.

Callum entered the picture after that. He and Knox were all-in together not long after.

It was the end of summer now. Knox’s daughter, Charlie, had gone back to Colorado with her mom. Knox and Callum were getting Knox’s son, Logan, ready to start school. It had all been hectic since earlier this summer, when Logan ended up in the hospital with an asthma attack and Knox’s ex-wife had come to town, so yeah, they weren’t around as much. Law and Remy had eased up on their visits too.

In our circle of friends, that only left me and Josh single. Where I was the least sexual person in our crew, which was a fucked-up way to word it, Josh was the most. He was always on apps, finding guys to spend a night or a couple of hours with. I got it. He didn’t have committed relationships and he enjoyed sex, so why shouldn’t he? I still didn’t get it, though; it was this muddled thing in my head, how someone could want something so much that was just whatever to me, even if it did feel good during the act.

But watching my friends pair up around me and Josh enjoying fucking his way through life, I began to feel more and more alone.

I thought maybe I wanted that too. Wanted someone. Then I told myself I didn’t do that, the feeling-needy thing. I was the one who took care of others.

That knowledge didn’t change the fact that I was currently pacing a hotel room, waiting for a man to show up, someone I’d found on an app. I’d tried women, more than one over the years, but I’d never actually been with a guy. Maybe I’d give it a go, something would finally click into place, and I’d realize I wanted to fuck a whole lot more if it was with a dude.

I was nervous as hell.

I tried sitting down, but my damn leg wouldn’t stop bouncing, making me shove to my feet and begin pacing again.

This was fucked. What had I been thinking? This was the worst idea I could have come up with. I wasn’t much into sex, so I planned to screw around with a random man when I’d never touched one sexually before?

I picked up my phone to cancel just as there was a knock on the door.

My pulse became a stampede beneath my skin, and my chest got tight. I could walk away, tell him no, or…I could try. Maybe that was all I needed.

My hand trembled slightly as I went to the door and opened it.

“Damn, man,” he said. “You’re even sexier in person.” It had taken me hours to find someone. I scrolled through profiles, trying to see what kind of guy I would even want. He was about my height, with chestnut-brown hair. He had a nice body, long, lean, and muscular, which I knew