Grace (The Family Simon #5)- Juliana Stone Page 0,68
alone.
“I can’t eat,” Grace said. “I can’t…” Her throat tightened and she clawed at her jacket, yanking the zipper down as she bent over. She saw the edge of Betty’s boot and shook her head violently. “Go away. I just want to be alone.”
“I’ll tell your mom you’re not feeling well.” Betty took a few steps and paused. “Matt is worth saving. I’m just not sure he’ll let you. I’m not sure he’ll let anyone.”
Grace didn’t answer. She ran for the bunky, closed herself in and rested against the door. It took a good long while for her to catch her breath and when she finally did, a guttural cry fell from her lips and she crashed onto the bed. It still smelled like him.
She squeezed her eyes closed and cried her heart out.
Her world had just changed and Grace had no idea how to fix it. She had no idea how to fix Matt.
She must have fallen asleep for hours because it was dark when her swollen eyes finally opened. Grace rolled onto her back and stared up at the ceiling. She felt heavy—as if she would sink through the bed, melt into the floor and disappear altogether.
She’d been through some bad breakups before. Ones that had left her feeling sorry for herself and more than a little lost. But none of that compared to what she was feeling right now. With Matt gone, knowing he was hurt and alone and angry—she felt so damn helpless.
Why hadn’t she told him how she felt? She loved the man, for God sake. That had to mean something, didn’t it?
Grace swung her feet over the edge of the bed and sat up, groaning as a wave of dizziness washed over her. Just then a knock at the door sounded and her mother walked in.
Eden Simon turned on the lamp and immediately enfolded Grace in her arms. Grace might have cried. She might have poured her heart out right then and there. But she had nothing left inside and no clue what to say.
“He’s gone.” That was all she had.
Her mother stroked her forehead and kissed her cheek. “I know.”
The two women rocked together in silence and Grace was grateful to have a loving, giving mother to hold on to. What had Matt ever had? As a young child had his mother wiped his brow and told him everything was going to be okay? Had his father kissed him and tucked him in at night? Had he known real love?
The sad truth was, she didn’t know. And it was the not knowing that fired her up.
“I have to go to him.” She pulled away from her mother. “I need to go to him.”
Eden was quiet for a few moments. She brushed back the mess of hair that hung over Grace’s eyes and tucked it behind her ear.
“You love him,” her mother whispered, sadness making her eyes shiny and wet.
Grace nodded. “I thought I knew what love was. What real love was. But I was so wrong. This thing between Matt and me…This love that I have for him is different. I guess it’s why it hurts more. Wanting to go after him is not just about being hurt that he left. It’s about knowing him and knowing he has some pretty awful things to deal with. It’s about knowing he thinks he needs to deal with them on his own. That breaks my heart.”
“He might reject you. If you go. That’s a real possibility.”
“I know. But what kind of person doesn’t at least try? Even knowing they might get hurt more than they already are?”
Grace watched her mother closely and saw something unexpected in her eyes. Sorrow.
Her mother cleared her throat and appeared to struggle to find the words. “When I was twenty-one I met a man who changed my life. And no it wasn’t your father.” A soft smile touched her face. “That came later.”
Eden played with the edge of the coverlet and glanced out the window into the dark. “His name was Ransome Belmont. He was the son of the foreman who worked Cousin Pierre’s sugar cane plantation. He was tall and handsome and so full of life. A real devil and up until that time the most exciting man I’d ever met. I fell for him the minute I laid eyes on him.”
“You never told me this.”
Eden shook her head. “It’s not a nice story to tell. You see, Ransome had his demons. He liked to gamble almost as much