Good To Be Bad (Good Love #3) - Lili Valente Page 0,63

did. I should have realized there might be a conflict of interest. I should have been prepared just in case someone—”

“Stop it,” Harrison cuts me off with a slice of his hand through the air. “We’ve talked about this before. No one can prepare for everything that could possibly go wrong. There is no Girl Scout with that many badges, Geeg. No superhero with that many special powers. Trust me.”

I shake my head. “But I skimmed right over the fine print. Who does that?”

Gram huffs. “Everyone. For all I know, I’ve sold my soul to the devil a thousand times over. I haven’t read a cell phone agreement or disclosure on my meds in years.”

Before I can chide Gram about ignoring possible drug interactions, she continues, “And what about your new friend? How did he take the news?”

I bite my bottom lip, fighting another wave of tears. “West texted right after to ask what he could do to help. And I told him to stay and beat Hawley, and he did stay. Even though he’s told me a dozen times the contest isn’t a big deal to him. And now…” I flail an arm in the general direction of Williamsburg. “He’s probably deep in dark chocolate soufflé mode by now. And I’m glad, I really am, but…”

“But you wanted him to come after you, which is understandable,” Gram says, shushing Joan when the big floofy beast meows in irritation, clearly not happy that Gram is still rubbing me instead of her.

“But also understandable that he stayed,” Harrison counters. “He knows you, right?”

I nod and sniff.

“So, he knows you’re competitive as hell and winning Mrs. Sweets was important to you,” he says.

I nod again.

“And you flat-out told him to stay.” Harrison is in big bossy brother mode now. “And because he’s a full-grown man who trusts the full-grown woman he’s dating to know her own mind, he respected your wishes and stayed to fight for the both of you. Even though it isn’t his top priority.” With an eyebrow arch that says you got what you asked for, he pauses before adding in a softer voice, “And even though you aren’t there to cheer him on.”

I press a fist to my chest, a horrible suspicion rising inside of me. “Oh no. I should have stayed, shouldn’t I? Even though I’m a gross, blubbering, mortified mess.”

“No, baby,” Gram says. “What you should do is be kinder to yourself. You should have started about thirty years ago, and I should have done a better job of helping you.”

Joan takes a sneaky swipe at my skirt, claws fully bared. The cat has never scratched me outright, but she’s shredded her share of innocent clothing in her attempts to show me my place.

Which is second place. Behind her majesty, the princess.

But Gram catches the cat’s paw.

Fitting, since Gram never made me feel second best. “You did,” I assure her. “That’s why I’m here. Because I know I’m loved. Safe, no matter what.”

“But you should be safe and loved anywhere,” Gram insists. “Anywhere you are. Anywhere you want to be. You’re always worthy of that. You don’t have to be perfect all the time or do everything right. That’s your birthright.”

I swallow hard, rolling her words and Harrison’s over in my head, mashing them together like ingredients in a pie crust.

Mixing until they come together.

Maybe I’m like a pie, one that just needed a little more time in the oven. A little more love—from these two people, but mostly from the baker.

From myself.

I’m the only one who can give me that.

It’s my choice. I don’t have to be just so.

I can be just me.

“If I weren’t so hard on myself,” I say in a halting voice as the new possibilities emerge, “then I wouldn’t have been so upset. And I would have been able to stay.”

And be there for West.

Be there for my man.

Harrison smiles proudly, squeezes my hand. “Or to stay even if you were upset, trusting that it’s okay to feel the way you feel. That there’s no shame in having a cry in public once and a while.”

I level a hard look at my brother’s always-in-control face. “When’s the last time you cried in public?”

“Second grade, I think,” he says with a soft laugh. He shrugs. “But I’m still a work in progress. And I’m a guy. That has its own set of challenges. I’m supposed to be strong and tough and take the lead. I bet it wasn’t easy for West to