Girl, Serpent, Thorn - Melissa Bashardoust Page 0,108

must have had only a few drops.

Would it be enough? The stains on the blanket were old and long dried. She would have to soak the blanket to get any use out of the blood, and even then, she had no idea if it would still be effective. If it were, though, then she could curse herself anew and become poisonous once more. But what if I can’t reverse it again? The simorgh was not in such easy reach that she could safely depend on using her feathers to lift the curse—and she knew better now than to take one of the simorgh’s feathers without her permission. What if the simorgh found her unworthy of such a gift? Would Soraya still be willing to make this choice?

Soraya’s mouth went dry, her eyes locked on the blanket with such focus that the stars began to blur. Would her poison be enough to stop the Shahmar? Parvaneh had told her previous attempts to kill him had failed, or even made him stronger, but her mother had trusted in this poison to keep her daughter safe from him. Before she had used the feather, Azad had always been careful not to touch her … and at the very least, she would have a way to defend herself against the other divs. She had no other plan, no other option. If she didn’t do this, she would very likely have to kill her brother and rule with Azad, or else watch her family die.

She was running her fingertips over the fabric without even realizing it, as if her hands knew what she was thinking and were trying to remind her of what she would be giving up. Her mother’s arms around her. The flutter of moth wings against her skin. Parvaneh.

But Parvaneh would sleep forever if Soraya didn’t do something to help her. As for her mother, Soraya already knew what choice she would make. And Tahmineh was the only person Soraya knew who had beaten the Shahmar at his own game.

Are you like your mother? Parisa had asked her.

Soraya clutched the blanket in her hands. Yes, she thought. Yes, I still am.

She shoved the blanket back under the bed, went to the door, and began pounding her fists on it as loudly as she could. Within seconds, the door opened, and a div with spotted fur like a leopard’s stood frowning at her. “Yes?” the div said.

“I’d like a bath,” Soraya told her.

The div nodded once and shut the door on Soraya.

She paced nervously as she waited, wondering if the div had simply nodded to appease her, when the door opened again, and the same div brought in a metal tub and two buckets of steaming water.

Cold water would have worked better for her purpose, but she didn’t know how to ask for it without warranting suspicion, so she thanked the div and waited for her to leave.

Once Soraya heard the click of the lock again, she dragged a chair to the door to block the handle as an additional precaution. If anyone tried to enter and Azad questioned her about it, she could say she wanted privacy for her bath.

After retrieving the blanket, she poured the steaming water into the tub. She focused on the task like it was something routine—like when she was working in her garden—concentrating on each action so that there was no room for thought. Otherwise she might forget that she had chosen this—that at one time she had even missed seeing those green veins under her skin and knowing she was untouchable.

She dipped the blanket into the water and watched the water slowly turn pink. When she thought the water was as pink as it would ever become, and the water cool enough to touch, she removed the blanket, undressed, and stepped into the bath.

The water came up to her knees, and she looked down at her feet, wondering if even now, they were becoming steeped in poison. It had only taken a few drops to curse her the first time, but she didn’t know if the blood would lose some potency when it was diluted with water. This was the best she could do with her limited time and resources: submerge herself entirely in the blood-tinged water, and hope that it would have some effect.

Soraya sat in the tub, letting the water cover her entirely except for her head. Her heart was beating wildly, urging her to flee, but she ignored it. She tried to ignore