Getting the Axe - Nikki Mays Page 0,9

did when I walked in. This place may be an unconventional form of therapy, but it’s exactly what I needed to get my mind right. It also helps to have someone who will call me on my shit and get angry at me when he feels like I’m fucking something up.

Does that mean that I’m going to take his advice and start sweet-talking my way into Elle’s life? No, probably not. As much as I want her, I don’t want to put myself in the position to be hurt again. And I know that’s exactly where I’ll be if I let Elle in and she only sees me as something to bid her time until someone better comes along. She’s endgame type of shit and I don’t want to be her starting line up.

I don’t even mean to be such a prick most of the time. But keeping her at arm’s length is the only way to keep me safe. Is it a shit move? Sure. But after being around her for months, I’m more than certain that she would own me without even trying if I let my guard down. It also doesn’t help my disposition that every fucker with a dick who works at Ross Construction—minus my brothers—can’t take their fucking eyes off of her.

But I could probably tone down my general asshole behavior around her. It’s not her fault that I’ve become an insane man who’s overly jealous when he has absolutely no right to be.

I climb into my truck and start the engine. I smile to myself as I listen to the diesel engine purr. I caress the steering wheel like one would a lover, since starting my girl up is the most action that I’ve seen in far longer than I’m willing to think about.

I pull out of the parking lot and onto the street in the direction of my house. It’s almost ten at night and the entire town is shut down. It’s peaceful and calming to seem like I have the whole town to myself.

And because of the new ink and just general feelings of peace, I’ve decided that I’ll agree to this company team building day. I’m sure that if it was anyone else who suggested it and not the woman who drives me insane that I would see the real merit in the idea. I’m sure that everyone would enjoy some fun downtime every now and again.

I’ll walk in tomorrow and calmingly tell Elle that she can go ahead with planning and renting out the axe throwing place. This way, we…me, can start working towards having a better working relationship, since thanks to my own stupidity, that’s the only kind of relationship that we will have.

Which is for the best, really. She needs a man her own age. Not someone who’s old enough to be her father type figure. Really, what are the chances that a beautiful young woman like her is going to want anything to do with a man who is close to forty already? Maybe this whole time I’ve been fooling myself into thinking that if I let my guard down that I would actually have a shot. When the truth is that she can do a lot better than me and I just haven’t really wanted to face the truth. That women don’t want a man who’s hair is more salt than pepper.

Which is good. We probably have absolutely nothing in common that would even make a relationship between us work. And that’s all that I need to keep telling myself. I can let my guard down and be sort of friendly towards her. Well, at least work on not being a prick. I’m sure any improvement will be better than how I’ve been behaving for the past few months.

I’ll just go into the office tomorrow and inform her that everything is a go. I’ll make pleasant conversation and inquire about the activities that she’ll be planning for that day. I’ll also continue to be a normal, non-feral idiot and remain a professional employer. I’m sure that I’ll be able to achieve this with ease. If I can go from partying and just generally not giving a fuck about anything in life, to a well-functioning business owner. I’m sure that I’ll have no problem succeeding in my newest endeavor of not being a love/lust struck fool.

I drum my fingers against the steering wheel and purse my lips.

I should probably give her some sort of an apology for