Getting the Axe - Nikki Mays Page 0,3

I snort mentally. Who am I kidding? Damon would probably help me just because.

I get up and hear more than a few bones in my body crack. Geez, isn’t that supposed to happen when I’m forty, not twenty-four? “My stomach doesn’t tolerate the pills very well. I can barely take aspirin without my stomach starting to roll.” I explain even though it’s none of his business.

“Well, I guess we don’t have to worry about you becoming a pill head.” He drawls.

I turn my head and look at him in confusion. “A what?”

“Pill head?” I shake my head no. “Pill popper? Ya know, addicted to prescription pills?”

“Oh.” I roll my eyes. “Yeah, most likely not. They gave me pain medicine when I had my tonsils taken out and it was a very miserable experience…that was even with anti-nausea medication.” I shudder just remembering the horror that was those first few days.

He shakes his head and smiles ruefully at me. “You can’t even help being good, can you?”

“What are you talking about? I’m literally daydreaming about killing one of my employers.” I snort as I start to push my cart down the next isle. Maybe I should just stop now and order the rest on Amazon. That’s the worst part of living alone, having to carry and put everything away on my own.

Declan sidles up next to me. His long legs easily catch up with me. “But you won’t do it. Face facts, you’re just too good of a person even after being raised by evil incarnate.”

I snorted at that statement. Brad and I really won the lottery for the world’s crappiest parents. My dad is an awful man who likes to abuse those—including me and Mom—that he views as weaker than him. He also is a bigot and a homophobe, just to add icing to his horrible cake. And Mom, well I used to feel sorry for her. Brad and I left as soon as we could. She chose to stay with him all those years. Our lives would’ve been so much better had she left Dad when we were little. But no, instead of blaming Dad for being abusive, like she should, she blamed Brad for all the beatings that she endured and hired people to kill him. When that didn’t work, she tried to kill Brad and Aimee herself. So yeah, Declan is right, they’re really evil incarnate.

“I figure having one homicidal maniac in the family is enough,” I say with all the enthusiasm of someone going to the dentist for a root canal.

“That makes sense.” He nods his head thoughtfully as though this is a completely normal conversation to be having.

When did my life become so odd?

“Anyway,” I decide that it’s time to change the subject. “Shouldn’t you be paying for your gross protein bars and getting to the gym?” I wrinkle my nose at the thought of eating one of those chalky things. Yuck!

He nods his head. “Yeah, probably, but I figured that I would wait until you were done and help you put everything in your car. Plus, it’s already getting dark outside. I wouldn’t feel right about not making sure that you got to your car safely.”

I look up at the sometimes sweet pain in the butt and place my hand on his arm. “Dec, you do realize that I’ve been shopping after dark all by myself before, right? It’s not a big deal. I appreciate the thought, but I’ll be fine.” I pat his arm a few times before turning back to my cart.

He comes up behind me and puts one arm around my neck. Kind of in a chokehold, but too loose to be scary. My guess is mainly just to be irritating. “I’m sure that you have. But while I’m here, I won’t be leaving until you’re safely in your car driving away.” He gives me a smile full of teeth.

I try to shrug him off to no avail. The man has tentacles like a dang octopus. “Dec, I’ll be fine. Plus, my brother and Danny are waiting for you.” I try. It’s not that I don’t find it sweet that he is willing to wait until I finish my shopping to walk me to my car. But I am a grown adult. I don’t need a babysitter.

He looks down at me and raises his right eyebrow. “Do you really think that either one of them will have a problem with me being late because I decided to make sure that you