Getting the Axe - Nikki Mays Page 0,1

She said that she gained over five pounds the last time that you went shopping.”

He throws his arms up at his sides. “She didn’t have to eat all of it. She’s the one who kept going back for stuff. It’s not my fault that she has no self control.”

“Do you want to be single again?” I ask the big dummy.

He frowns down at me. “No, why?”

“Then you might want to quit while you’re behind.”

“For your information, smartass, I’m only here to pick up some snacks for your brother and myself. We’re heading to the gym to workout with Danny but we need fuel.” He holds up the gross-looking protein bars that I swear he wasn’t holding a minute ago. Seriously, did he just conjure them out of thin air?

“Oh.” Is my absolutely witty reply before I see what he’s wearing and smirk. “You better hurry up and get out of here. Aimee will kill you if she finds out that you came waltzing in here in grey sweatpants.” I chuckle.

She really would too. It took Brad, Stacey, and myself to stop her from going after some woman who was hitting on Declan the last time he wore grey sweatpants in public. Did the woman only hit on him because of the sweatpants? Probably not, but that didn’t matter at all to Aimee. She yelled at Declan for the rest of the day for leaving the house ‘looking like a whore’ while the rest of us cracked up. Poor Declan just kept looking at her like she had lost her mind.

He shakes his head ruefully. “I love Aims, but damn is she nuts some days.”

“You’re just lucky that we were able to hold her back, otherwise you would be visiting her in prison.” I snorted.

Dec snaps his fingers loudly, drawing the attention of those around us, causing me to go bright red. “Prison. Right. We were talking about finding someone to help you hide a body.” He says loud enough for the dead to hear him.

I grab his arm and pull him—and my cart—into the next isle. “Will you be quiet!” I hiss. “I don’t need the whole town thinking that I’m planning on killing someone.”

“You mean except for the fact that you are planning on killing Noah.”

I look up at him curiously. “I never said that I was planning on killing Noah. Daydreaming and actually doing something are two totally different things!”

“Elle, my Belle, he’s the only person in the world who actually pisses you off, which is saying something considering who your parents are.” He’s not wrong about that. “So, what did he do today?”

I can feel my anger and blood pressure rising again. “He’s being intolerable again. I’m trying to plan a day for all the employees to have a fun afternoon together.” Dec looks at me weirdly. “A team building exercise, if you will.” He nods his head.

“But…?”

“But,” I huff out. “That big butthead is doing everything in his power to make it impossible.” I look up at Declan and give him my best puppy dog look. “Any chance that you might be able to arrest him and keep him in a jail cell for a few weeks?” I even bat my eyelashes for good measure.

“For what?” He laughs. “Being a nuisance?”

I can feel my eyes get big. “Is that a thing? Because then we could probably keep him there for months!” I ask excitedly and make sure to ignore that weird feeling in the pit of my stomach. I probably just ate something that didn’t agree with me.

“Elle.” He says with a smirk.

I roll my eyes. “Oh, come on. You helped your brother push Michelle’s ex in front of a car. Don’t tell me that you can’t figure out a way to get Noah out of mine and everyone else’s hair for a little while.”

He rubs his hand down his face. “I feel like we’ve somehow circled back to murder.”

I shrug. “I mean, it’s not like you’re overly opposed to that.”

He places both hands on his hips. “It’s not like I’m a damn serial killer!” He hisses like a feral cat. “And that car barely nicked him! He only had a few broken bones.”

“Yeah, you’re definitely winning cop of the year.” I drawl.

“What happened to that sweet and quiet girl that I first met?”

“That girl has been dealing with Noah Ross for months. Sweet and quiet Elle is dead and gone. In her place is pissed off and possibly homicidal Elle.” I say as I begin