Genesis Girl (Blank Slate #1) - Jennifer Bardsley Page 0,57
about.
“She’s safe,” I whisper back, trying to smile, like him. “I don’t know where she is, but she’s safe. You don’t need to worry.”
“Don’t worry? This is all my fault!”
“Of course it isn’t.”
“Then whose fault is it?”
“Nobody’s,” I answer. “It’s just the way it is.” I’m not sure if that’s the truth or not.
I can feel Beau’s blood beat fast as I hold onto his shoulder. I can smell him sweat. His smile is turning false.
“Neutral,” I remind him. “Placid, calm, not easily upset. Remember what Ms. Corina used to say.”
There’s nothing better than neutral. Staying poised could get you through anything. Keep your face placid and everything will be okay. Because if somebody does know what you’re thinking, then you’ve already lost a little bit of your privacy that will never come back.
“Headmaster Russell already cornered me tonight, asking me about why Fatima’s not here. What am I going to do?” Beau knits his forehead into a mass of wrinkles.
“I don’t know.”
“How will this work?”
“I don’t know,” I say again. “But you have everything you need to achieve happiness.”
“I don’t, Blanca. Not without Fatima. Not without my child.”
We don’t get the chance to say anything else because the music stops. Beau spins me around in a final twirl, and there’s Trevor, waiting to cut in.
“How’re you doing, beautiful?” Trevor asks me as the music starts up. He’s sticky under his white shirt and smells like cheap body spray.
“I’ve been better.” I fight to stay calm.
Trevor isn’t listening to me. He navigates our way through the dancers and steals glances at Sarah.
I look too.
She’s over by the water table talking to Headmaster Russell. The conversation appears animated. Sarah knocks over some water glasses on purpose and tries to stalk away. Headmaster Russell grabs her arm and then glares right at us.
I feel Trevor’s muscles stiffen. He pauses, missing a beat, but keeps dancing. “Blanca, you’re beautiful,” Trevor says, not meeting my eyes. “Blanca, you’re perfect. I could dance with you all night.”
I don’t want to dance with Trevor all night! In fact, I strongly consider rearranging that Soap-boy face of his until the only thing he can sell is Band-Aids. But I smile up at him anyway until Headmaster Russell lets Sarah go.
“Where’s Ms. Lydia?” Trevor asks, like everything is fine. “Did you get the chance to talk to her?”
“I most certainly did.”
“Did you tell her how things are going? Did you tell her how much I want to be with you?”
“Yes.” I’m smarter than this. Trevor’s trying to control me. I see that now. He’s giving me the full force of his Soap-boy smile.
But Cal said I could choose about Trevor. He said I didn’t have to be with Trevor if I didn’t want to.
So when Trevor starts in again about how pretty I am and how I’m such a great dancer, I make my decision. “Stop,” I say. “Please.”
“What?”
“I’m going to do you a favor,” I say. “I’ll tell Ms. Lydia that you’re the best boyfriend ever, only I’m not interested.”
“I don’t understand.” Trevor looks into my eyes at last.
“I’ll tell her it’s my fault,” I whisper. “I know about the Vestal-cest.”
Trevor’s usual clear skin floods with color and becomes splotchy. “How’d you find out?”
“It doesn’t matter. But why’d you make me your target?”
“I had to.” Trevor slumps his shoulders. “I was under directions.”
“From who? Your company, or Ms. Lydia?”
“Do you even have to ask?” Trevor says. “She wants you to be happy. For some reason, you’ve really captured Ms. Lydia’s attention.”
“I’ll tell her I’m happy, all right.” I stick out my chin. Happier on my own, alone with the truth.
I’m beginning to sound like Seth.
The manor is quiet when I arrive home. There’s no Cal, no Ms. Lydia, and no Seth waiting to pounce.
I don’t know why I’m disappointed.
I thought at least Ms. Lydia would be there waiting up for me, to see how the banquet went. To hear Trevor talk, Ms. Lydia cares about me a lot.
But Ms. Lydia’s not there tonight, and she’s not there the next morning either. When I ask Cal about it at breakfast, he says Ms. Lydia was summoned.
“I have travel plans too,” he says. “I’ve some business to attend to that might take a few days. Will you be okay here on your own? Do you want me to call Seth?”
“No, thank you. I’ll be fine.”
“I know it.” Cal winks. “You’ve got good instincts, and you can think for yourself.”