“And people buy that?” I set the last bowl to dry in the rack and peeled off my rubber gloves.
“Uh, yeah they buy that. Why would you drop a couple grand on a nice Pottery Barn or Restoration Hardware bed, only to have some hideous foam staircase next to it from PetSmart?”
I nodded. “I get that, I guess.”
“Which reminds me—I’m out a carpenter,” she said to Sloan.
Sloan’s brow furrowed. “What? Since when?”
“Since Miguel quit on me last week. He got a union job at Universal doing set work. Dropped me like I was radioactive. I have three stairs on order.”
Sloan shook her head. “What are you going to do?”
Kristen shrugged. “Put an ad on Craigslist. Hope the guy doesn’t end up being some kind of pervert out to kill me to sell my organs on the black market.”
I snorted.
Brandon nodded at me as he put a new bag into the trash can. “Josh is a carpenter. He’s pretty good at it too.”
Sloan looked at me. “Really?”
Brandon was already fishing out his cell phone. I knew what he was pulling up. The tiki bar I’d built in my backyard. Celeste’s tiki bar. Brad’s tiki bar.
“Look,” he said, handing around the phone. “He built this.”
Sloan nodded in approval. Then the phone went to Kristen, and she glanced at it before her eyes shot up to mine.
“Not bad,” she said begrudgingly.
“Thanks. But I’m not looking for any side work,” I said, waving them off. I didn’t need to build dog stairs for pennies on my day off. The living room of my new apartment was still full of boxes.
“Yeah, who needs an extra two hundred dollars for three hours of work?” Kristen said, flipping a hand dismissively. “Not Miguel apparently.”
I froze. “Two hundred dollars?”
Sloan sprayed the counter with lemon-scented all-purpose cleaner. “Sometimes it’s more—right, Kristen? It depends on the style?”
Kristen stared at her best friend like she was telling her to shut up. Then she dragged her eyes back to me. “The stairs run four to five hundred dollars apiece, plus shipping. I split the profits fifty-fifty, minus the materials, with my carpenter. So yeah. Sometimes it’s more.”
“Do you have a picture of the stairs?” I asked.
Kristen unenthusiastically handed me her phone and I scrolled through a website gallery of ridiculous tiny steps with Stuntman Mike posed on them in different outfits. These were easy. Well within my ability.
“You know, I think I do have time for this. I’ll do it if you don’t have anyone else.” A few of these and I could pay off my Lowe’s card. This was real money.
Kristen shook her head. “I think I’d rather take my chances with the organ thieves.”
Sloan gasped, and Brandon froze and looked at Kristen and me.
“Is that right?” I said, eyeballing her. “How about we talk about this over coffee.”
Kristen narrowed her eyes and I arched an eyebrow. “Fine,” she said like it was physically painful. “You can build the damn stairs. But only until I find a different guy. And I will be looking for a different guy.”
Sloan looked back and forth between us. “Is there something you guys want to tell us?”
“I caught him staring at my ass,” Kristen said without skipping a beat.
I shrugged. “She did. I have no excuse. It’s a great ass.”
Brandon chuckled and Sloan eyed her best friend. Kristen tried to look mad, but I could tell she took the compliment.
Kristen let out a breath. “Give me your email address. I’ll shoot you the orders. When you’re done with them, let me know and I’ll generate and send you the shipping labels. And I’ll be inspecting every piece before you take them to FedEx, so don’t try and half-ass anything.”
“Wait, you don’t have a shop?” I asked. “Where am I supposed to build these?”
“Don’t you have a garage or something?”
“I live in an apartment.”
“Shoot. Well, it looks like this won’t work out.” She smirked.
Sloan stared at her. “Kristen, you have an empty three-car garage. You don’t even park in it half the time. Can’t he work there?”
Kristen gave Sloan side-eye.
I grinned. “He can.”
A loud beeping came over the speakers throughout the station followed by the red lights. We had a call. Kristen held my stare as the dispatcher rattled off the details. Too bad. I could have hung out with my cranky maid of honor a little longer.
No luck.
Brandon leaned in and kissed Sloan goodbye. The girls would probably be gone by the time we got back. “We’ll finish cleaning up,” she said.