Thea always wanted to be. And I’m honored to be here with her. Honored she chose me…” He stopped, cleared his throat, and looked directly to me. “Thank you for keeping me wild. I love you, Thea. I hope you had the time of your life.”
He strummed his guitar and began singing Green Day’s “Good Riddance, Time of Your Life.” My heart beat in my chest, filled with the love of a thousand lifetimes all crammed into one, all for Jimmy. Every single lyric written for us. This trip and what was coming after. To make the best of everything and not ask why because there was no why. Only now.
The room went absolutely silent and still. No one clinked a glass or so much as coughed while Jimmy’s low, rough voice accompanied his expert playing. He filled every lyric with the depth of our experiences, singing as if he’d written the song himself.
When the last note dissipated, the crowd seemed to be holding its breath. I held mine. Then the applause came, slow at first and growing louder. A few whistles pierced the air, and he smiled.
“Thanks,” he said into the mic, and turned to me, mouthing, Thank you.
He returned to the table, and I took his face in my hands and kissed him. We clung to each other and the audience cheered again. No doubt we looked to them like a happy couple in love with our whole lives ahead of us.
“Jimmy…” I whispered as he held me.
“I know.” He huffed a steadying breath. “But hey, you said if I sang for you, you’d be naked by the second verse.” He shook his head. “You’re not even remotely naked.”
A teary laugh burst out of me. “I see what you did there.”
“I’m just trying to get us out of here before I fucking fall apart,” he said. He took my hand and pressed it to his lips. “Let’s go.”
We grabbed a cab back to the hotel. In our room, Jimmy hung his jacket on the back of the chair and then I was in his arms. The city glittered outside the window, a thousand lights strewn over the darkness.
“Tonight was perfect,” I said between Jimmy’s deep kisses. “I can’t believe you sang in front of an audience like that.”
“I was singing for you.”
“You told me you loved me.”
He pulled away, his eyes beautifully dark and full. “I do. I’m in love with you, Thea, and have been for a long time… I just didn’t know what it was.” He stroked my cheek. “You don’t have to say it back. I don’t expect—”
“I know you don’t,” I said. “James Whelan, you don’t expect anything for yourself. You just give and give… I love you for that. I love you for everything. All of you. I’m so in love with you, Jimmy.”
He froze as my words sunk in. A muscle in his jaw ticked. He inhaled a shaky breath. Exhaled slowly.
“No one’s ever said that to you before, have they?” I asked.
He tilted his chin up. “No.”
They don’t know who they had, right in front of them.
He took my face in his hands. “Don’t cry for me, Thea,” he said gruffly. “It was supposed to be you who said it first.”
I stared, flooded by love for this man. “Yes,” I whispered. “That’s right. I love you.” I kissed his mouth and kept my lips on his. “I love you, Jimmy. I love you so much. My warrior who never stopped fighting for me.”
“I won’t,” he said. “I never will. I swear it.”
I heard the future in his voice—the inevitable time when I was going away again. Sitting right in front of him and yet not all there.
“Stay with me,” he said. He kissed me harder. “You’re mine. You’ll always be mine. I’ll take care of you. Keep you safe.”
I surrendered to him. To his mouth that captured mine, his tongue that swept through every corner. His gentle sucking pull taking me out of my thoughts and into him. Losing myself in his hands that roamed my skin and his body that pressed against me, hard and full of need.
We kissed until I had to come up for air, clinging to him as his mouth worked down my neck, biting softly. Memorizing me. Indulging in me and giving me everything at the same time because we had no way to know how much time I had left.
“Every inch of you,” he said, undoing the delicate little laces at the top of my