have finished work yet and she’s one of those people who sticks to the rules. No personal mobile use during working hours. I was one of them too. Afraid to step outside the rules. Afraid of getting burnt… again.
Taking the christening gown from the bag, I allow myself a moment of happiness. This is going to look beautiful on Shay. Really holy. My mother would have loved it.
I don’t think about my mother too much because it hurts. Forgiving should have come naturally to her. She’d spent so much time in the church where forgiveness was a big part of their gig. Forgive thine enemy. Forgive thy neighbour. Forgive those who hurt you. Forgive, forgive, forgive… I never remember there being a clause attached that says, except daughters. Do not forgive them.
The door opens. In walks Conor with his suit jacket open. His tie hangs loosely over his shirt. He walks directly over to the crib and finds Shay fast asleep.
‘Well, how did it go?’ he says.
‘Great, everyone thought he was beautiful.’
‘And did you get the…’ Conor looks at the gown in my hand. ‘Is that it?’ He moves closer, scanning the tiny garment. ‘Is that not for a girl?’
‘No, it’s a christening gown. They’re not gender-specific, Conor.’
His lack of excitement disappoints me. I didn’t expect him to jump around with joy, but I thought he’d at least pretend to care.
‘Well, sure, what would I know? As long as you’re happy with it. I’m going to jump in the shower.’ He walks towards the door. ‘Mammy’s going to put you in a dress, Shay.’
I sense the humour in his voice. It puts me at ease.
* * *
The phone beeps just as Conor arrives back in the room. Shay is now sitting on my lap sucking on his bottle. I can’t very well disturb him and rush to my phone.
Dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, Conor hovers over the open fridge door.
‘Sorry there’s no dinner ready, I’m not long home and I’ve already eaten. Do you want me to make you something or see if there’s a pizza in the freezer?’ I say.
My eyes are fixed on my phone out of reach. I’m expecting the worst: that Rose will confirm it was Vicky Murphy who was asking about me. If she does, I’m going to confront Maggie. I have to know if it was her and if so, why.
Conor unwraps a frozen pizza and places it in the oven as per the instructions he reads out loud to himself. He struggles with the settings, so I tell him to hold Shay, I’ll do it. He kisses my forehead while lifting Shay out of my arms and I head straight for the phone, unlocking it with my thumbprint and putting the oven on at the same time.
It’s Rose.
Yes, that’s her.
My heart sinks. A shiver of fear runs through my body. Vicky Murphy was investigating me.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Like it isn’t bad enough my husband is eating a frozen pizza for dinner after a hard day at the office, his mother arrives to witness it. With a bag in each hand, she strolls past me into the kitchen, babbling on about someone who wouldn’t be able to attend the christening. I can fully understand that at such short notice but, seemingly, Maggie has plans to remember this someone in the future.
By the time I close the front door and arrive in the kitchen behind Maggie, she has already formed an expression of disappointment.
‘Is that what you’re having for dinner?’ She chuckles to imply that this is a light-hearted comment. But I know better.
‘I was in Dublin today,’ I say, walking straight over to the bouncer where I talk to Shay.
‘Mammy’s going to teach you to be a great cook, not like poor Daddy.’ The words leave my mouth before I have a chance to stop them and there’s a brief silence as Maggie adjusts to the new atmosphere. Conor tries to defuse it, saying the pizza wasn’t that bad.
‘Dublin,’ she says. ‘What had you there?’
‘I brought Shay up to meet my old colleagues at Imanage. They thought he was beautiful.’ Lifting Shay in my arms I say, ‘Say hello to Nana.’
Maggie walks over to say hello to her grandson and immediately the battle is put on hold.
‘Well of course they did,’ she says, cooing into Shay’s face.
With the last slice of pizza in his hand, Conor tells Maggie about the christening gown I purchased. I didn’t want him to. I was hoping to break that