Firstlife (Everlife #1) - Gena Showalter Page 0,113

no desire to try. As soon as we reach the bottom, I throw my arms around his waist, hugging him from behind. “You are a wonderful person, Killian. Better than you’ve ever given yourself credit for.”

He turns and clings to me for a moment, only a moment. A stolen treasure of time. Then he disengages and, as if nothing happened between us, continues down the passage. When we reach the end, he punches a code into the pad by the door. The door’s hinges creak as he peeks outside.

“How did you know the code?”

“Archer spoke to Maggie, then to me.”

The two are working together now? Without my aid?

Killian leads me into the haze of the approaching night, the security lights that surround the house shining from different walls. Not that it matters. He’s an expert at evading every pocket of illumination. And the guards on patrol. Without incident, he gets us to the road, where a silver Porsche awaits. I’m surprised when Elena climbs out and throws the keys at Killian.

He utters a hasty “Thank you” before taking her place behind the wheel.

“I hope you’re worth it.” She glares at me. “He’ll never recover from this. Neither will I.”

“I— Thank you.” I don’t know what else to say, and know she won’t accept an impromptu hug. I climb into the passenger seat. Tires squeal as Killian speeds away. “Killian—”

“I’ll be fine.” He reaches over and takes my hand. He’s still trembling. Our fingers link, and I don’t mean to, but I cleave to him. “I always am.”

“There’s a first time for everything. What if—”

“No. We can’t go there.” Can’t operate in a state of fear. “Do we have a destination tonight?”

“Yes. Your aunt’s house.”

Aunt Lina. Loony Lina. “I haven’t seen her in years.” I wonder which version of her I’ll find today. “Won’t that be the first place Pearl looks?”

“Yes,” he repeats, “but she won’t find you there.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Don’t worry. You will. Pearl mentioned tracking you, which means she had a tracker put inside you. I should have known.”

A tracker? “How?” I ask, appalled. “Where?”

He squeezes my hand. “Do you know what I thought the first time I saw you?”

There’s a sense of urgency in his tone now, as if he has a wealth of things to say but only a short time to do so. “Let me guess. Great, she’s crazier than I heard.”

His chuckle is soft but ragged. “Yes, but soon after that?”

“After I punched you in the throat?”

“During our date.”

“No.” I lose my breath. “Tell me.”

“I thought of something Archer told me right before he defected to Troika. Something I hadn’t allowed myself to think about until that day. About a horse—”

“Hey!”

He smiles at me. “A warhorse. It’s a compliment.”

“Well, then, let’s hear the rest of this supposed compliment.”

“The day Archer chose Troika, I told him we were enemies and I would come for him. I told him that his father would forever hate him, and that he’d make it a personal mission to destroy him. His response confused me, until today. He said, The warhorse paws fiercely, rejoicing in its strength, and charges into the fray. It laughs at fear, afraid of nothing; it does not shy away from the sword. The quiver rattles against its side, along with the flashing spear and lance. In frenzied excitement it eats up the ground; it cannot stand still when the trumpet sounds. At the blast of the trumpet it snorts, ‘Aha!’ It catches the scent of battle from afar, the shout of commanders and the battle cry.” Killian squeezes my hand. “Then he added, When you fight for what you know is right, my friend, you already have the victory. There’s nothing to fear.”

I place my free hand over my heart, moved in a way I would never have expected. A warhorse, unafraid of battle, actually craving it, daring his opponents to fight him, his enemy’s efforts only making him laugh, because he knows he’ll win. “You thought I was brave.”

“And kind. And odd.”

“Hey!”

“You shook me up. The things other assignments valued meant nothing to you. The things I valued meant nothing. Only when I spoke of a past I’d rather not remember did you soften toward me, as if you saw something in me no one else ever had.”

He shook me up, too. He’s still shaking me up. “Do you want to know what I thought about you when we met?”

“Please, Killian, kiss me.”

Ha! “Close. I thought you were the most beautiful boy I’d ever seen...and

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